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FRD: Ditto progress the damn sarge

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So I am writing this as a "daily" FR similar to the Animal's challenges, just without the actual challenge.

 

Saturday 13 OCT

Stayed up until 7am to catch the train back to Shanghai, slept for about 5 hours on train.

Got the the hostel around 3, met my 70 year old roommate who was intent on teaching me advanced Chinese, ran about 50 minutes in the dark, so I was in a good mood

Running buddy turned to go home, I passed a 2 set that looked cute, ran another few hundred meters and decided to not be a bitch and turned around to open them.

Jogged just past them, they weren't that cute,  opened with  "hey, I just passed you going the other way and had to come back and talk to you" Set lasted 5 minutes, tried to push for wechat early, forgot to get logistics early on. Said she doesn't use wechat, replied "wow you're the only person in China that doesn't! That's crazy!" How about qq? No. Good me neither. Had to wipe sweat out of my eyes about 20 times. Set also tried to walk away 3 or 4 times throughout, at first I blocked them, then I stood there and just talked loudly. Mostly BT spikes and minor arm kino when they laughed. Tried to engage the obstacle by asking questions about her friend. Eventually the obstacle somehow told the target to give me her wechat lol. I took a picture of her qr code. Said, why don't we get dinner tomorrow --in bad Chinese. Found out they were from out of town, leaving the next morning, and already on their way to dinner. Said okay, then we'll have dinner the next time I'm near there. Ejected with a smile and wave, continued run

Second set walked past me failing at pull ups and panting (lol), looked like a nice body, turned around and saw her watching me. She jumped a little when I saw her and promptly left. I finished bar dips and ran her direction, found her on the stairs walking her dog. A little hazy, think I used a direct opener. BT spiked, kinoed a decent amount, stroked her forearm at one point for no reason. pet her dog. She speaks nearly zero English, I made do with the Chinese I've got. A 4-5 minute set, got her wechat and said we should go out, she has to deal with work, but said we have wechat we can figure out a time.

Third set, opened a girl making 'convenient noodles.' Sat down with her, kinoed a lot and BT spiked, after she made her noodles she wanted me to try some, so I got her to feed them to me. She also speaks very little English so we communicated in mostly Chinese, she started using her translator after a while and I'd respond in simple Chinese. About 15 minutes in she said she was going to see her friend. I said I could come too, that sounds fun. Her friend is a guy, and she seems to have to googoo eyes for him, so I say hi, compliment his hat and wristband. I tone down the kino in front of him as I'd been touching a LOT. Ended up complimenting the guy more and gaining compliance from him, and doing comfort and (not enough) qualification with the girl. I stay in set about 3.5-4 hours, we go to the store and then noodles while I get them to translate things in Chinese for me. At one point the guy is playing a game and I am rubbing the inside of the girl's thigh and she finally shuts me down by grabbing my hand, albeit gently. Later in the night the guy tries to awkwardly kino by rubbing her upper back and gets shut down fast. Eventually girl says she's going to sleep and they say goodnight.

Fourth set, about 45-60 min, girl sitting at the same table as I walk back from saying goodnight, she's watching anime. I just pull up a chair in plain view and say, "what are we watching? " She laughs, and tells me. She ALSO speaks no English, what a day. BT spikes, comfort about jobs and where we're from, no qualification. Early and often kino, forgot to do two steps forward one step back. Was kinoing her face and with my thumb running inside the neck of her shirt on the back. Set 3 actually came back downstairs carrying a cat, I laughed and said hi, asked if it was theirs. No. Cat ran away from them when they set it down. Talked to the guy a bit and they left. Went to go pet the cat, girl joins me. I laugh and say it really wants beef. She goes and gets some, and we feed the cat, kino her some. Talk some more and she says she should sleep.

 

 

Sunday 14 OCT

Went to a mcdonald's on my way back from the store, at night, I am covered in massive bug bites from last night but oh well. MILF starts looking at me as I eat, I smile. Finish my food, walk over and do the hand of god opener without talking, try to engage the rest of the 4 set by shooting them a goofy smile. Try the only goofy sign language that I could come up with, pointing at my head, then her, heart, me. They heard me talking to the lady who took my tray from me and were laughing confused, so I bitched out and just said "I think you're cute, can I get your wechat?" said I liked one lady's silly shirt. They offered me a seat but I said "I want to run," not sure if it was "I want to go running," or "I need to run though" but they said "oh ok!" I smiled, waved and left.

 

 

Things I did well:

Kino early, and getting calibrated enough to preempt getting shut down usually

Approaching when I don't feel like it

Got out of my own head some and stopped thinking so much about what to say

Used my Mandarin knowledge creatively to BT spike and make intelligible statements

Kino felt more natural and less forced

 

Things I will improve:

I will get back into my head just enough to remember to add in qualification and comfort rather than just talking aimlessly

I will continue improving my chinese

I will start ejecting sooner if I don't like a set and don't think the practice is helpful

I will relax and enjoy myself more when in set with girls I don't find attractive, so I can wing better

I will start opening more of the hot girls I see that are out of the way so I can get practice!

 

Realizations:

Great game may seem super natural, but mine doesn't yet

Normal people have parts of their game figured out, but often make huge mistakes too

Having everyone you pass like you gives its own form of social proof, increases compliance

Kinoing aggressively but naturally seems to make girls more likely to return kino

 

 

 

Edited by Ditto
5 points, improvements, realizations
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2 hours ago, RedpoleQ said:

Great report!  Looking forward to following your progress and commenting when I think I have something to add.

Thanks! I'll figure out how to be more succint the more I do this I think hah. Writing FR's really does help me think about my sets more, and realize really how much I just fall into the trap of not trying to push one of the five parts of the sarge.

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FR D2 Muslim girl

What are chinese muslims usually like in the willingness to bang department? It's killing me because she has a nice body and seems to want to meet me, but I don't know how I should be playing it. Maybe I should just ask what her religion requires and know what I'm dealing with? Or spend the time and try to build comfort and possibly get shut down anyway while escalating.

 

This is the girl that was late because I didn't ask her to confirm she understood it was at 3pm. 

Got to the station and waited at the exit for a reply, tried to message some other girls to see if I could get them looking at their phones if this girl flaked and I wanted to try and get them out. She replied that she was on her way, so I went to look for the ramen place with good reviews on apple maps. Either none of the people working where it should be have ever seen it, or it has closed down. She arrived. Was waiting at the exit again bc I told her to text when she was close. Tried for a hug because she was very kino compliant the other night, probably went too fast. She hesitated and drew back a bit so I just picked her up, lifted her to the top stair, and laughed. I tried asking a couple people on the way, including a lady working in a Japan health first restaurant where it was, they pointed in a direction opposite the map, so we walked. Eventually I decided we should just go find somewhere and happened to ask and find a sushi place. Kino on the way over was all leading her by the lower back on and off.

She walked behind me by a half step almost the whole way, think she was feeling bad about the mixup in times. Over text she said "sorry to have kept you waiting" before arriving and I tried not to reinforce the behavior by saying it's fine, but just told her where to meet me. 

At the restaurant I told her I had to meet my friends in 2 hours, should probably have said that over text because she looked kind of slighted, possibly misattribution. We ordered, and my Chinese today was not flowing off the top of my head very well. Lots of translator. BT spikes, scooted next to her so our legs were touching. She scooted away a few times and I'd just wait and get close again later. She said she couldn't eat much so I used it as an excuse to kino her stomach and took her hand and had her feel mine lol. She seemed to like that. But throughout dinner she was relatively distant, I tried starting qualification and instead got into some comfort stories about my childhood. PROBABLY NEED TO QUALIFY MORE, she's doesn't swim and is afraid of heights though. Should have remembered to talk about the anime she was watching because my adventerousness qualifiers fell through. Communication was slow and she said I should eat instead of talking so much. After dinner I paid and asked if we could go out on the terrace. She let me lead her by the hand to some part that was overgrown because I wanted to see what was there.

Turns out she messaged me on wechat (in person before dinner ended) that she was meeting her friends and needed to get back to the hotel, but my phone had bad connection and I didn't check until after the D2. Walked her back, relatively uneventful with me mostly stumbling over my words and bad google translations. She told me "No!" when I slipped my thumb in the 'fashion belt' around her waist, she had a dresspants thing on. I think she just felt like she had to slow me down somehow

 

Realizations:

I really need to work on my chinese, and though being in set with chinese girls who speak no English works for that, it isn't super fast and I should spend more time studying on my own

I need to try harder to qualify or girls will probably continue to seem to slowly lose interest

Having cute girls smile at you while you're on a D2 can cause at least a small increase in compliance

 

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20 hours ago, Ditto said:

What are chinese muslims usually like in the willingness to bang department? It's killing me because she has a nice body and seems to want to meet me, but I don't know how I should be playing it. Maybe I should just ask what her religion requires and know what I'm dealing with? Or spend the time and try to build comfort and possibly get shut down anyway while escalating.

Just try to close as normal.  By bringing up religion, specifically you're possibly creating a problem where there isn't one.  All objections will come out when you try to close.  If you're concerned, you can roll out some of the sexual frames that we talked about in the Art and Science of Sex Seminar.

21 hours ago, Ditto said:

At the restaurant I told her I had to meet my friends in 2 hours, should probably have said that over text because she looked kind of slighted, possibly misattribution.

Girls don't like it when you make other plans after them because it shows a low level of interest in them.  Also, it's possible she wanted to get full closed and your time constraint meant that wasn't possible.  On the other hand, it can be a DHV by showing that you're not THAT into them.

21 hours ago, Ditto said:

my adventerousness qualifiers fell through.

What are these, exactly?

21 hours ago, Ditto said:

Turns out she messaged me on wechat (in person before dinner ended) that she was meeting her friends and needed to get back to the hotel, but my phone had bad connection and I didn't check until after the D2.

I wonder why she texted you instead of just telling your directly...strange.

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On 10/16/2018 at 2:23 AM, RedpoleQ said:

Just try to close as normal.  By bringing up religion, specifically you're possibly creating a problem where there isn't one.  All objections will come out when you try to close.  If you're concerned, you can roll out some of the sexual frames that we talked about in the Art and Science of Sex Seminar.

Gotcha, that does seem like a good plan!

On 10/16/2018 at 2:23 AM, RedpoleQ said:

Girls don't like it when you make other plans after them because it shows a low level of interest in them.  Also, it's possible she wanted to get full closed and your time constraint meant that wasn't possible.  On the other hand, it can be a DHV by showing that you're not THAT into them.

OH, okay so I'll try to tune that based on the girl's attitude and what it seems like her frames about guys liking her are. I just remember in one of the chats it was recommended to always have a time constraint, that way I could push it back and give them value by doing so. Though it seems that this may be best implemented if I mention the time constraint before the date, and only on girls who don't seem really keen. 

On 10/16/2018 at 2:23 AM, RedpoleQ said:

What are these, exactly?

My adventurousness qualifiers are. Does she like/what does she think about: skydiving, scuba diving, going new places without a plan, and backpacking. At a lower level I ask about if they like swimming or running, I actually often get "I'm afraid of water"

On 10/16/2018 at 2:23 AM, RedpoleQ said:

I wonder why she texted you instead of just telling your directly...strange.

Oh, because a lot of people seem to like to use WeChat to translate. So it's not uncommon for them to switch between a translator and showing me the screen, and sending wechat messages that you can translate, where they can add stickers and whatnot

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FR Tuesday 16 OCT

D2 with a girl I opened in the subway on the way to meet Kane. Made a silly comment from a bit behind her, and she started hurrying up like she was trying to run, so I told her she didn't have to speed up and started asking where she learned English. 

Set D2 for noon and double checked the night before and day of, she was still an hour late because of work. Oh well, I had time to open a few sets and find the restaurant.

Plan was park -> talk and build rapport -> restaurant -> possibly try to push for a movie 

She arrives and I intentionally wait a minute before meeting her at the station (I was in set with some girls working at an English center anyway) She's happy to see me. Hug, easy because she went to school in Scotland. Walk to my new favorite ramen shop. She's very kino compliant, though I am BT spiking and doing qualification and comfort, the flow isn't amazing so I didn't try really pushing the kino by spanking her or anything. I make a comment about some yellow reflector strips on a car stopped at a light, she says I should ask them, so I do for about 30 seconds, seemed like a good BT spike/ illogical frame to open up. Take her and run through one of those kiddie things that squirts water out of the ground. She does all kinds of sports and has a nice body, but not great makeup. That can be trained though I figure.

She doesn't want to get married or have kids until much later, I assume this is good. We talked about how some people get married so young, I say "maybe it was for the sex, my first gf was definitely ready to get married but maybe it wasn't just because of the sex"(it definitely wasn't, but I was trying to somewhat subtly lay a 'I know what I'm doing' frame down.) She says you have to be careful of STD's, all I can reply with is yeah but you can prevent all but herpes with a condom.

At the restaurant the food is great as always, and she likes it and Japan. I do the eliciting values routine from the black book and kino. All goes well, except my ability to have a constant flow of conversation (I pause reasonably often and have to think) but at one point she tells me this story about how she had ramen and had intense diarrhea for a week. I tell her she's not supposed to tell me that kind of stuff but she persists. How do you deal with this? And it seems like this can be both a shit test and just behavior that I'd want to negatively reinforce. Though I don't have much idea how to deal with both at once.

D2 went well, ended before movie because she had to go meet a student and travel to her home outside shanghai so I took her to the xtd taxi rank

 

Opened one 1 set after

Came back to the hostel and saw a girl who had an awesome looking rack in the bathroom washing her hands or something, so I went to wash my hands then decided fuck it and walked into the door of the girls bathroom to tell her I thought her scarf matched her look really well. She was responsive and actually walked over the few feet to let me touch it, she actually speaks pretty good English. BT spike, kino, all the easy stuff for me and we walk over near her room and keep talking. I think she had to get something or wanted to show me (I REALLY should have tried to isolate here.) Soon 4 other guys were trying to join in and talk to the girl. I responded by being friendly to all of them but turning back to her regularly and asking comfort and qualification questions and kinoing by feeling the scarf she now wrapped around her hands. I eventually figure out she's far less kino compliant in front of a lot of people, but at this point she's enjoying our hands touching and my other kino.

Set ended up 5 hours long before she went to sleep.

It just felt really good that all the other guys were coming out of the woodwork to try and talk to this girl (understandably, she knows how to dress quite well) and none of them had enough game to get her to turn her attention to them for much longer than their questions lasted. 

Seeded my xtd ramen shop, running, meditation, her coming to visit California or Japan. Bounced her to the supermarket to help me buy water and snacks after she had left to her room at one point when there were too many guys and we were all playing pool and darts.

Roommate plays guitar well, she was super into it, and even said how awesome she thought being able to play guitar was. However she only smiled at me the whole time, probably because I had built enough rapport with my roommate that he was playing the guitar for me to show me songs he knew.

Tried time bridging for ramen the next day, she said she had work and couldn't tell when. So I said she should message me when she's done and we can go.

 

 

Wednesday 17 OCT

D2 with girl from last night

Ran into her at the free breakfast, watching one of her drama shows. She sticks around for about 5 minutes and I get some kino and BT spikes in.

Happen to catch her around 3 hours later and I say is she done with her work. No, she fell asleep, but do I want to go in about 45 minutes and is it close? Okay, and only a 15 minute subway ride (with a 15 to 20 minute walk haha) 

Meet her right on time, she is much more kino compliant without too many people watching. Do eliciting values again with the intent to do marriage routine later. She doesn't really understand super well but it still goes over pretty well and she at least laughs. Do a lot of DHVs and try qualification and comfort on the ride and walk over. Today I'm even worse than yesterday and I pause often between thoughts, fluff talk and my next step in the sarge are escaping me.

She seeds going to the biggest starbucks in the world, ice cream, and boba. Cool.

She wants to fix her computer because it is slow so I offer to do that first. No, food first is okay. Didn't kino a ton during the first part of the date, but got to the point where I was squeezing her thighs often in the restaurant, and stroking the exposed skin on her arms.

Tried Kane's advice about doing the Italian thing and showing more emotion when I talk about things that can be emotional. I talked about how I was so engrossed with science as a child that I couldn't interact with other kids well, and did the frowning face bit. Holy shit, her body language immediately got even warmer and she tried to tell me how great she thought it was that I like science LOL. Thanks Kane.

Japanese restaurant owner kinda gave me a bit of an amused/confused look as I saw it. Sadly it's a small shop and they remember me from when I came by myself. She jokes around with the guy taking orders and everyone seems happy. I continue just trying to do qualification and comfort. I touch her necklace and ask if she likes wearing chokers. She translates, laughs and says yeah I wear them sometimes they're sexy. I laugh, say yeah they are, and squeeze her thigh tightly. Then I go on to say that I wish everyone could wear them because they're practical in swordfights as a silly BT spike, though that probably ruined the positive reinforcement that I'd just made for her wearing chokers.

After dinner I ask what time tomorrow she can go out, she says every day she doesn't know when she has to work. So I have to ask you out every day? Yes (smile). Okay, I don't like it but I'll do it. Also she said a few times, maybe next time we can bring more friends, or 'we're good friends so we can share food.' I said no, just you and me, it's better. Okay to the food, but when she offered to pay half I said no, you don't let a girl pay when you take her on a date. It seemed like she was really testing if I liked her which means I probably need to do way more statements of interest.

At the end of the d2 I show her to the apple store to see if we can get her computer fixed but she gets another text from her boss, this one says he's nearby and wants to talk about work. She just got the job and starts next week so apparently there's a lot of training and logistics to figure out. I say okay, work is important, give her a hug and continue on rebuffing her be careful with an "I don't need to be careful, I'm invincible! (or tough, something along those lines)" Sent her a message right after saying that I had a great time and want to see her again

 

Opened 3 sets

Girl and her mom walking out of Shanghai fashion week, everyone's chasing her taking pictures and heads are turning. She's got a lacey shirtpant thing that shows quite a lot. Ask her what to do about the Chinese guy chasing me trying to get me to buy a ticket (of whom I had been enjoying messing with telling him I'd pay 23 kuai and going down from there.) She says count to 3 and run. I laugh, that seems like a good plan. So what is this fiasco anyway? Shanghai fashion week. But what do they do? Models and something blah blah. Oh you're a model! No just working there! *kino* Haha well you can't blame me for thinking it. (Not talking to the mom nearly enough) we get to the corner and they're trying to leave. I ask the mom in chinese if I can have her daughter's wechat. She says nope. I laugh and say please. She's from Beijing. Okay then next time I'm in Beijing I'll find you. Haha okay. I walk off like a retard, I definitely could have kept trying. 

Girl's shirt says GROWL on the back. I open from the back, do you growl often? She ignores me, I plow for about 30 meters with no result and laugh at myself for being in too much of a hurry to open.

Stop and look quizically at a girl who is playing with a mandolin at the hostel. HB 5 but it wasn't even meant to be an open really. She laughs. I ask if she's learning. No, this is her friend's, how long am I staying. Tomorrow I leave. Her English isn't bad but not great, that's sad then I can't see you again. I'm coming back in a couple months, and I'm not leaving Shanghai. She doesn't understand that I'm staying in Shanghai and seems kinda dejected even though we just met 30 seconds ago. I say she can come with me, she can't because she works at the hostel. I get her wechat and say I'll tell her when I'm around. Meet her later and she understands I'll still be in Shanghai now. Maybe I should see how keen she is over chat.

 

Things I did well:

Planning and using the same d2 plan so I can troubleshoot

Got girls to go out over text!

Remembered to do more qualification and comfort

Getting a lot better at being confident in my cold approaches

Tried to show some emotion, even if it was largely contrived

 

Things I will do better:

I will make kino more natural for me so I can do it without thinking about where to kino next

I will try to push, even if softly, for girls to stay out longer to add value to them

I will GET BETTER AT FIGURING OUT LOGISTICS

I will maintain better posture in public. (the crazy guys at fashion week took pictures of me being silly and I felt like I was slouching)

I will do the RPQ walk where I continue to walk forward and turn my torso to talk to people behind me, instead of pretending I'm in gym class

 

Realizations

Girls really love thinking they have an impact on you

Statements of interest are important

Kino in public seems to be awkward for Chinese girls but they usually go along with it anyway

Chinese guys get suspicious even seeing you talk to a lot of girls apparently, even if you aren't kinoing hard

Working a 3 set where multiple girls seem really interested is hard because they dislike it when you give the others attention.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited by Ditto
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20 hours ago, Ditto said:

Hug, easy because she went to school in Scotland.

Was it the full body hug or the lean in upper body only hug?

20 hours ago, Ditto said:

She says you have to be careful of STD's, all I can reply with is yeah but you can prevent all but herpes with a condom.

Probably a better frame is to say something like, "Yeah, that's why I don't do one night stands.  Too risky," or something like that.  No point in talking about STDs, unless you can say that you just got checked and even then frequent checking just implies that you fuck a lot of girls randomly (otherwise you wouldn't need to get checked...)

20 hours ago, Ditto said:

at one point she tells me this story about how she had ramen and had intense diarrhea for a week. I tell her she's not supposed to tell me that kind of stuff but she persists.

This is some Asian thing.  They don't have nearly as much of an issue with discussing bodily functions, like Westerners do.  I don't think there's much you can do, but I'd be keen to hear other people's opinions.

20 hours ago, Ditto said:

Came back to the hostel and saw a girl who had an awesome looking rack in the bathroom washing her hands or something, so I went to wash my hands then decided fuck it and walked into the door of the girls bathroom to tell her I thought her scarf matched her look really well.

Respect!

20 hours ago, Ditto said:

we walk over near her room and keep talking. I think she had to get something or wanted to show me (I REALLY should have tried to isolate here.) Soon 4 other guys were trying to join in and talk to the girl

You should have tried to bounce her somewhere for isolation...

20 hours ago, Ditto said:

Bounced her to the supermarket to help me buy water and snacks after she had left to her room at one point when there were too many guys and we were all playing pool and darts.

Glad you jumped on this opportunity, but you probably should have tried to engineer it earlier.  For all you know she WANTED to be alone with you.

20 hours ago, Ditto said:

Sent her a message right after saying that I had a great time and want to see her again

Instead, you should do some call back humor to bring her back to the positive state of the day 2, and talk about what you'll do when you see her tomorrow...show don't tell.

20 hours ago, Ditto said:

I ask the mom in chinese if I can have her daughter's wechat. She says nope. I laugh and say please. She's from Beijing. Okay then next time I'm in Beijing I'll find you. Haha okay. I walk off like a retard, I definitely could have kept trying. 

What SPECIFICALLY will you do next time instead?  One thing though, always suggest the mom and the daughter are friends or sisters.  The mom's LOVE that.

Great FR, and keep them coming!

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On 10/18/2018 at 6:14 AM, RedpoleQ said:

Was it the full body hug or the lean in upper body only hug?

It was a full body hug, I think. It was standing straight up, she wasn't wrapping her legs around me or anything

On 10/18/2018 at 6:14 AM, RedpoleQ said:

Probably a better frame is to say something like, "Yeah, that's why I don't do one night stands.  Too risky," or something like that.  No point in talking about STDs, unless you can say that you just got checked and even then frequent checking just implies that you fuck a lot of girls randomly (otherwise you wouldn't need to get checked...)

Ah okay I will definitely use the one night stands line next time

On 10/18/2018 at 6:14 AM, RedpoleQ said:

This is some Asian thing.  They don't have nearly as much of an issue with discussing bodily functions, like Westerners do.  I don't think there's much you can do, but I'd be keen to hear other people's opinions.

Okay because my mother and grandma both do the same thing and I wasn't sure if it was an attempt to ruin her being sexy

On 10/18/2018 at 6:14 AM, RedpoleQ said:

Respect!

Thanks! It felt pretty good after I did it haha

On 10/18/2018 at 6:14 AM, RedpoleQ said:

You should have tried to bounce her somewhere for isolation...

Oh that's what I meant to say, but yeah I will definitely be looking to bounce girls for isolation much earlier in the set now, especially in a place like that

On 10/18/2018 at 6:14 AM, RedpoleQ said:

Glad you jumped on this opportunity, but you probably should have tried to engineer it earlier.  For all you know she WANTED to be alone with you.

I totally forgot the detail that another guy managed to tag along as we were leaving. But yes that's an excellent point, I should have tried rather than just assuming she wanted to be in the group.

On 10/18/2018 at 6:14 AM, RedpoleQ said:

Instead, you should do some call back humor to bring her back to the positive state of the day 2, and talk about what you'll do when you see her tomorrow...show don't tell.

AH, just like "you looked like you were having a lot of fun in the water fountain for kids" kind of thing right? I tried this with Scotland girl today and it went over really well. Thanks!

On 10/18/2018 at 6:14 AM, RedpoleQ said:

What SPECIFICALLY will you do next time instead?  One thing though, always suggest the mom and the daughter are friends or sisters.  The mom's LOVE that.

THAT is a great line that I can't believe I didn't use haha. Next time I will start by asking the mom the questions that can be answered by anyone, open the set! Though she didn't speak English so I could have the daughter translate if she isn't already. Use the "your sister is really x." And if she gives me an easy one like saying ok to me finding her in Beijing, I'll ask for her wechat again and explain that it's because I have to use it to find her.

On 10/18/2018 at 6:14 AM, RedpoleQ said:

Great FR, and keep them coming!

Thanks! And the feedback helps immensely I feel pretty dumb for not trying to do this sooner haha!

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On 10/20/2018 at 12:49 AM, Ditto said:
On 10/18/2018 at 10:14 PM, RedpoleQ said:

Was it the full body hug or the lean in upper body only hug?

It was a full body hug, I think. It was standing straight up, she wasn't wrapping her legs around me or anything

Hahahaha!!!  I wouldn't expect the leg wrap!

On 10/20/2018 at 12:49 AM, Ditto said:
Quote

This is some Asian thing.  They don't have nearly as much of an issue with discussing bodily functions, like Westerners do.  I don't think there's much you can do, but I'd be keen to hear other people's opinions.

Okay because my mother and grandma both do the same thing and I wasn't sure if it was an attempt to ruin her being sexy

Naw...it's just not considered to be a problem to talk about for Asians.  When I was teaching English in Japan, my adult students would show up and I'd ask them how they're doing it they would frequently say that they were either constipated or had diarrhea!  Even the young hotties!

On 10/20/2018 at 12:49 AM, Ditto said:
Quote

Instead, you should do some call back humor to bring her back to the positive state of the day 2, and talk about what you'll do when you see her tomorrow...show don't tell.

AH, just like "you looked like you were having a lot of fun in the water fountain for kids" kind of thing right?

Right, exactly!

On 10/20/2018 at 12:49 AM, Ditto said:
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Great FR, and keep them coming!

Thanks! And the feedback helps immensely I feel pretty dumb for not trying to do this sooner haha!

This is how people who learned PickUp have always learned.  Go out (preferably with other guys who are both better and worse than you) >> write FRs >> repeat!

Works every time!

 

 

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FR Sat 20 OCT

Plan for the day was to meet Kane to help him test his post boot camp curriculum some. 

D3 Bathroom girl
Had been messaging her for a couple days to go out with me. Used the Disney store I seeded in person mostly. Turned into lunch because I was moving from an awfully far away hotel (thanks for the wake up call lol, TheRomantic) and she was actually nearby. D3 lasted just over an hour and a half, which I managed to push to keep her slightly longer than she intended, but still needed to meet Kane.

I let her choose the restaurant (I really need to stop doing that) and it was okay. It was a small square table against the wall and I moved my chair to face the room so we were at a right angle for better kino. She was still very kino compliant for basic kino, hands touching and moving her hair out of her face is totally normal to her, but when I lead her by the back  she has started to squirm. I really need to do 2 steps forward 1 step back, not 2 steps forward and a little more forward.

Tried training her a little bit to want to wear necklaces I can play with and complimenting things about her clothes or her actions I like. The choker necklace thing got way harder after I explicity mentioned it though.

She was happy and we parted ways with a smile on the metro


Opened one girl who was standing nearby by just tilting my phone towards her, where I was reading the subconscious book. She laughed and seemed interested, I said I'd give her my wechat and was too slow, subway stopped at my transfer station and I left. Need to be faster if I think they're keen.

With Kane and TheFertilizer

Opened first girl with Kane's lesson plan in mind, talked way too fast for the first few opens, a few I wasn't interested in and didn't stay after finishing the basic lesson, or didn't smile genuinely.

A few very short sets went by, I got shut down a few times by the crosswalk because I wasn't paying attention and wasn't expecting decent results, so I didn't get any. I also didn't push till I got blown out most of the time.

Tried to find a set to bring TheFertilizer in to wing and hooked(?) a 3 set by the corner, then the light changed. Instead of following or bringing in my wing earlier I just asked if they wanted to come have lunch with us instead. They said thank you but no and started walking across the street.

Winged on a trash girl for TheFertilizer for about 5 or 10 minutes in the mall, kept her interested and laughing mostly, but I could do a lot better.

2 set by subway we could have pushed for isolation a lot sooner, was a short set but I could have gotten more compliance with more DHVs and comfort sooner, but I was interested in her biology work. WC closed but pretty low compliance.

Kane opened a 4 set walking by while TheFertilizer was doing something, we started talking and TheFertilizer came in slightly later. I pushed a joke about being Korean too long with the unattractive girl I was with, she didn't like that and compliance dropped after that significantly, duh Ditto. Other interesting things from that set were that TheFertilizer and Kane bounced back the odd girl out both running a "2 set" on and off and keeping her entertained. They also managed to work around opposite each other and get pretty good isolation on a set that did not want to isolate.

After TheFertilizer left, I opened a few more girls. One notable one was a short ABC dressed in workout clothes. I didn't want to open her at first but Kane said to just do it. I opened with the I think you're cute and if I remember correctly there was some resistance to that. She kept backing away slightly at first. I learned soon that she was from LA and liked it way better, but was doing marketing or something in Shanghai. I didn't readjust for a western girl and just kept showing interest and trying for qualification and DHVs. I was not really enjoying the set much because she was pretty full of herself and I didn't find her very interesting, which is awful because I am naturally drawn to the interesting people. Found out she was waiting for a cab about 5 minutes out. Tried to wechat close and said next time she's in Shanghai we could meet, she refused, which threw me because I immediately wanted to stay "you aren't even close to good enough to be acting like you're hot shit." But I tried a couple more times to justify getting her WeChat instead. She left. I definitely need to just focus on more DHVs and maybe less positive body language with western girls. Also Kane mentioned earlier that I should watch TheFertilizer and how calibrated he is to the energy level and body language of the girl when he opens, so I need to work on that too.

Last notable open was a girl that at first sight I thought to easily be an 8 walking reasonably fast by us. I got well in front of her at Kane's behest and did the stop I think you're cute open. She stopped and was quizzical. I complimented her clothes and her skirt. I asked if she was meeting friends tonight. She's going on a date. I used TheFertilizer's line, "That's okay I'm not jealous" and asked if it was her boyfriend. No. Okay, well give me your WeChat before you go and next time we can go on a date. I don't even know you. I'm Ditto, I'm from San Diego, I like long walks on the beach, looooooong walks. She laughs. You know me better now! We exchange a couple more words and she gives me her WeChat. Turns out she's a conservative medical student and serious about only dating one person, but has expressed that she finds me attractive over messaging and is open to me waiting to see what happens with her(after some convincing). Fine by me, I'm actually really interested in this girl, though she'd probably be long game game.

 

 


FR Sun 21 OCT

I guess I should actually start giving the recurring girls HB names

Had a d2 planned for the milf who I opened for her orange workout clothes in xtd, heretofore known as HB SpasticDancerMilf. It was raining and she was finishing an event she was working at late, so I let her decide when to meet and eventually let her change the location a few times, big mistake in hindsight, though just waiting for her to finish while waiting in one place is shitty too. I spend too much time trying to hold position but I have no cell signal, location sharing isn't working. She ends up cancelling and suggesting tomorrow after about 20 minutes, saying she's too tired.

Opened sets going to and from, one notable one. Opened a 3 set of models working at the budweiser/fashion week event in xtd. Was unhappy about HB SpasticDancerMilf cancelling so I wanted to cheer myself up lol. Opened the set with "what is this? I see you all decided to wear matching outfits." There's one who speaks good English, I end up talking to her and her coworkers go and giggle alone after a while. I run comfort and attraction for about 10 minutes, doing the how long can I hold this handshake (about 2 minutes) and find out she's a lesbian but she gives me her WeChat anyway. I then go and get the cute one's WeChat and she easily obliges with a smile and an "I don't speak English." So I say some funny things in Chinese and she laughs and says it's nice to meet me. I ask her to come to a movie date with me that night, she's cute but not better than your average cute girl so I wasn't worried about getting blown out. I also am pretty immune to the word model after my highschool girlfriend, who people thought was hot just because she was a model. I also find out a few days later that this girl is engaged haha.

 

 


FR Mon 22 OCT 

At this point I've been pushing pretty hard to get girls to meet me late at night, many have been unhappy to, a lot of them I learned actually because I was using the word date. Oops, bad word in China.

D2 HB SpasticDancerGirl
I go to meet HB SpasticDancerMilf and she's running me all around the city. I go with it at first because I'm not thinking straight and engaging myself in this fantasy that I'm a secret agent being run around the city to meet with a defecting foreign national. After a while I come to my senses and tell her I will wait right where I said I would, and she will meet me there. I give more detailed directions when she says I should go somewhere else because it makes more sense.

She is actually escorted over by a guy that I asked if he had seen her. She speaks zero English but is excited to see me and jumps all around and gets loudly excited that "my chinese is so good." I really need to stop using all my Chinese so fast on the d2s with girls who don't speak, they get lulled into this sense that I can understand them and it backfires.

Even though I meet her, she takes us to these two overpriced steak restaurants, I pick one because she's indecisive and looks at me to do it. Their food wasn't even good but oh well. I sit next to her on the bench. I say she can either sit in the chair across or sit next to me when she protests. I scoot closer and she's okay with it and then not, back and forth. She's just always doing something frivolous, no wonder she is always too tired to meet late at night. She wants to stand up and do the waltz in the restaurant. She repeatedly stops, lets go and makes us start over. At the end of dinner she expects me to pay for the meal when she ordered 3/4 of it by price, disqualified her immediately for lack of showing effort and the implied frame of her using me. I get lucky that my alipay doesn't work so I pay half in cash and tell her she has to come get the rest from me.

I push for her to come back to my place to watch a movie (that I didn't seed) and get her money. No, she's got work tomorrow. I spank her when she makes a face at me and send her off. I decided that she's getting downgraded to direct home invites but she keeps telling me that I should tell her when I get back to Shanghai.

Open a few sets on the way there, none of note.

 

 


FR Tue 23 OCT

D4 HB BathroomFriendGirl

HB BathroomFriendGirl actually messaged me Monday night saying we should go to the DisneyStore to get my mom her shirts, and the biggest Starbucks (both things seeded d1 I believe.) I say sure that sounds great. She has to get a physical or something so she's closer to the city center.

I tell her to meet at Jing'an and we can go to Cantonese or Hotpot, at this point I'm pretty over letting girls choose places because 1. they are usually overpriced for the quality and 2. BECAUSE I'M SUPPOSED TO LEAD, I don't know how I let that slip so much. I meet her and see the temple, I have us go look in the gate quick even though she's hungry and seed that I'd like to go see it. We walk towards cantonese and tell her if I see something on the way we'll go there instead. I see a japanese place that looks good, lucky me it was. We have lunch, I do much better sexual state projection but never pull her into it really hard, she seems to slow down and get into it but then go "you don't understand my English do you." I try to reassure her her English is fine, I just like looking at her. I also see some of the pictures she had on her wechat timeline on her phone while she's translating something, I tell her to send them to me, because it's only okay if she sends them, she questions but complies easily. My idea was to associate good feelings with her sending me pictures of herself, I think it helped.

We go towards the Disney store and it's tiny and has nothing, we smell the weird stuffed animals that smell and make jokes. Then we go to Starbucks and she takes some pictures of me so I can show my family. Then we take a couple together with her version of Meitu which she gives up on because the creepy cute stuff on girls makes me look like some kind of demon spawn.

She has been complaining that "we don't act so close in China, and I shouldn't lead her around by the back" though she clearly appreciates it sometimes. I tell her that that's just what I'm used to. I should have mentioned the couples I see openly making out and holding hands. After Starbucks we go past the Disney store again and I stop quick and try to get her a 50 kuai little thing, figure it's something she'd have to think of me by, she strongly refuses many times. We go for ice cream where I remember to do the bs palm reading and "You're going to have 9 kids" bit. It goes well.

On the way back I do the marriage routine and she's resistant but I just push through it and keep insisting, when I get to the end and say we get divorced she didn't seem relieved at all haha. We take a couple pictures with new filters(?) she's found and I snap a few because she has me hold the phone, and on the third one I squeeze her ass and try to get it in the picture. No visible response, she just keeps smiling. I laugh and tell her I wanted a picture of her reaction. 

We finally leave by Subway after 3 and a half hours and she seems very happy. When I get off the subway I say goodbye just before the train stops all the way and bump into a lady, HB BathroomFriendGirl looks embarassed, I grin and wave on the way out anyway. So much for a good final experience though. I text her about a few things from the date and then when she seems somewhat less excited than I expected (might be confirmation bias from the last part of the interaction) I text her that she has a nice butt by the way. She says leave me alone! I laugh and tell her it's funny she didn't react, but she really does. She gets past the complaints pretty quickly but is still less compliant when texting than I'd like. -This is not that I like texting, just that it's hard for me to judge if she's unhappy or just not texting because she really doesn't text much. 

 

 


FR Wed 24 OCT

Opened one girl in the waiguo ren line at the airport, she's a pretty decent 7 or 8 and I just made a joke about her safety pins and that she was in Shanghai for fashion week. She was. Sister in LA, she is going to Vietnam. Should have number closed after security but I booked it for the gate instead even though I could have spared a few minutes easily. Missed chances.

Opened another girl after the flight that I wasn't sure if it was saftey pin girl and I just misremembered how hot she was. I'm blind, turns out it was a milf but I said hi anyway. She asks if anything was wrong with her clothes and I say "yeah it's terrible" laugh, explain the safety pin girl, and lift her jacket to see if she has the saftey pins too. Reopen her twice, once in security and again at a store and wechat close her after a few more minutes of comfort and attraction because why not.

After I get off the plane we stop at Costco for gas and food, I see a pretty cute girl standing near the exit who clearly works there. I ask what she's doing there. Selling heating and AC. "Oh haha, you are actually selling something" she giggles as I continue to walk past. Even though my mother was with me and I was in a daze, I should have asked for her number anyway. At least it was good for my confidence though.

 

I should really not write up so much at once, it ends up being way too long and I worry I miss some important details regardless. Side note, maybe it's just me but I like the female security guards' bodies a lot of the time, maybe I need to find a way to open them haha!

 

 

5 Things I did well:

-I remembered to sexualize after d1s

-I am making an effort to subtly RPQ influence the girls

-I pushed for the girls to stay out longer than they said they would

-I did more and more fluid comfort stories

-I usually remember to kino everyone so that it doesn't look suspicious when I do it to my target

 

5 Things I will improve:

-I will remember to lead the interaction barring considerably unordinary circumstances

-I will try to push through fluff talk for more attraction, qualification, and comfort

-I will keep conscious of my state and not do quite so much testing (especially in the texting area) on girls I am interested in trying to reg

-I will make a conscious effort to calibrate myself to the girl's body language and energy level

-I will try to make more life ads when I go out

 

5 realizations:

-Opening girls in the middle of the subway train results in a lot lower compliance than when they are leaning against one of the doors

-I really need to find things I like to do in the city like sports, paintballing, weird bouncehouses, places that I can go that make me feel less like I'm stuck in a mass of just restaurants, traffic, and girls.

-I need to play down my Chinese ability at the beginning of the D2 as well as the D1

-I should probably go back over some of the dating habits I learned in high school, like looking at how to remove the girl's clothing before we got to the theater, or denying her something or getting her something without making it seem like an ordeal

-I need to focus on how to progress the sarge much faster and more smoothly, because an average of not even close to closing on the D4 is not where I want to be.
 

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On 10/22/2018 at 12:05 AM, RedpoleQ said:

Hahahaha!!!  I wouldn't expect the leg wrap!

:classic_biggrin: If only though ha!

On 10/22/2018 at 12:05 AM, RedpoleQ said:

Naw...it's just not considered to be a problem to talk about for Asians.  When I was teaching English in Japan, my adult students would show up and I'd ask them how they're doing it they would frequently say that they were either constipated or had diarrhea!  Even the young hotties!

WOW! Okay that is a great story haha

On 10/22/2018 at 12:05 AM, RedpoleQ said:

Right, exactly!

Thanks!

On 10/22/2018 at 12:05 AM, RedpoleQ said:

This is how people who learned PickUp have always learned.  Go out (preferably with other guys who are both better and worse than you) >> write FRs >> repeat!

Works every time!

 

 

I can feel the results already! I'm not an instant Don Juan DeMarco but the reflection really frees up my mind next time to ponder new things while I'm supposed to be paying attention to the girl. How do you get the quote within the quote by the way? Just copy paste from the last comment?

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On 10/26/2018 at 12:47 AM, Ditto said:

I'm not an instant Don Juan DeMarco but the reflection really frees up my mind next time to ponder new things while I'm supposed to be paying attention to the girl.

PERFECT!

On 10/26/2018 at 12:47 AM, Ditto said:

How do you get the quote within the quote by the way? Just copy paste from the last comment?

Yup, that's exactly how.  Copy and paste from the time stamp of the quote you want to quote.

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On 10/26/2018 at 4:17 AM, RedpoleQ said:
On 10/25/2018 at 8:47 AM, Ditto said:

How do you get the quote within the quote by the way? Just copy paste from the last comment?

Yup, that's exactly how.  Copy and past from the time stamp of the quote you want to quote.

Nice! That makes this a lot easier, thanks!

 

What do you think I should be doing differently when HB bathroomfriendgirl verbally objects to my kino? Should I be stopping a lot longer and doing more comfort and attraction? 

 

Also for the girls who are high energy to the point of not being able to sit still, how would you deal with that? Try to match their energy level or just smile and make sure that you are controlling the interaction even if you're playing along?

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On 10/26/2018 at 12:38 AM, Ditto said:

I let her choose the restaurant (I really need to stop doing that)

Yes, you do. This is a great way to end up in all sorts of bad situations.

On 10/26/2018 at 12:38 AM, Ditto said:

I really need to do 2 steps forward 1 step back, not 2 steps forward and a little more forward.

😂

On 10/26/2018 at 12:38 AM, Ditto said:

The choker necklace thing got way harder after I explicity mentioned it though.

What do you mean?

On 10/26/2018 at 12:38 AM, Ditto said:

well give me your WeChat before you go and next time we can go on a date. I don't even know you. I'm Ditto, I'm from San Diego, I like long walks on the beach, looooooong walks. She laughs. You know me better now!

NICE!

On 10/26/2018 at 12:38 AM, Ditto said:

Turns out she's a conservative medical student and serious about only dating one person

Ummm...what makes you think she's conservative? Because she said she is? Don't listen to what women say about themselves...they're busy managing their image.  Remember the Madonna/Whore dichotomy? She's on the way to a date and gives out her number to a random dude. WARNING! WHORE! 

So, she tells you that she's conservative or whatever which feeds your ego by making you feel extra special and also makes her feel like she's framing herself as Madonna enough that you will respect her.

On 10/26/2018 at 12:38 AM, Ditto said:

I have no cell signal

Why were you waiting somewhere with no signal? You should always wait somewhere convenient for you and you should always be prepared for girls to be late or to cancel because they do...FREQUENTLY.

On 10/26/2018 at 12:38 AM, Ditto said:

I also find out a few days later that this girl is engaged haha

Lols. She told you or you saw it on her WeChat or something? Anyway, since you're leaving, it's perfect for her. All the evidence of infidelity will fly away and she doesn't have much time to party before it's time to get knocked up and pop out a baby.

On 10/26/2018 at 12:38 AM, Ditto said:

At this point I've been pushing pretty hard to get girls to meet me late at night, many have been unhappy to, a lot of them I learned actually because I was using the word date. Oops, bad word in China.

You shouldn't say date in any country. It makes it too formal and serious. You want it to be as casual as possible whereas saying it's a "date" puts a lot of expectations and it also means that the girl has to have romantic intentions towards you which she may no be comfortable acknowledging.

On 10/26/2018 at 12:38 AM, Ditto said:

Even though I meet her, she takes us to these two overpriced steak restaurants

This is why you shouldn't let girls pick. Ask in the group chat for day 2 ideas!

On 10/26/2018 at 12:38 AM, Ditto said:

She's just always doing something frivolous, no wonder she is always too tired to meet late at night. She wants to stand up and do the waltz in the restaurant.

This is also called, HAVING FUN! And is a great quality in a girl who you have communication problems with.

On 10/26/2018 at 12:38 AM, Ditto said:

At the end of dinner she expects me to pay for the meal when she ordered 3/4 of it by price, disqualified her immediately for lack of showing effort and the implied frame of her using me.

This is NORMAL traditional female behavior. Why? If you can't afford it, then why should she want to date you? If you can't afford a steak dinner, how could you afford to take care of her and the kids, right? 

The bigger problem is that you allowed yourself to be in this situation, in the first place. This is exactly why you should decide where to go and not leave it up to girls. She may not be "using" you. This might be totally normal for her and the guys she dates. Also, you need to remember that Asia does't have all this western hogwash about male/female equality, where men are men and women are men too.

If you're not happy with women playing a more traditional role, then you'll need to stick to westernized women...I would't recommend it though 🤮

On 10/26/2018 at 12:38 AM, Ditto said:

I get lucky that my alipay doesn't work so I pay half in cash and tell her she has to come get the rest from me.

Don't make it transactional, tell her that next time it will be on you. I know you're cheap, but don't appear cheap. It's very unattractive.

On 10/26/2018 at 12:38 AM, Ditto said:

I push for her to come back to my place to watch a movie (that I didn't seed) and get her money.

This is pretty good. You should have led with this.  "Sorry about that...I have more cash back at my place, so we can go back and get it." That's a pretty decent (though arguably dark) home bounce plan.

On 10/26/2018 at 12:38 AM, Ditto said:

I decided that she's getting downgraded to direct home invites but she keeps telling me that I should tell her when I get back to Shanghai.

She's not attractive enough to take our for coffee? Most of the problems you had with this girl were of your own making. You should never take a girl to a place where you'd be unhappy about having to pay the full bill and you're not required to give her levels of compliance you don't want to.

The key is to give her compliance strategically, but never so much that you'll be angry or upset.

On 10/26/2018 at 12:38 AM, Ditto said:

I tell her to meet at Jing'an and we can go to Cantonese or Hotpot, at this point I'm pretty over letting girls choose places because 1. they are usually overpriced for the quality and 2. BECAUSE I'M SUPPOSED TO LEAD, I don't know how I let that slip so much.

I'm equally baffled...

On 10/26/2018 at 12:38 AM, Ditto said:

I also see some of the pictures she had on her wechat timeline on her phone while she's translating something, I tell her to send them to me, because it's only okay if she sends them, she questions but complies easily. My idea was to associate good feelings with her sending me pictures of herself, I think it helped.

It's also better to train girls to send you pics directly than to have to download them like some pervy stalker, lols.

On 10/26/2018 at 12:38 AM, Ditto said:

She has been complaining that "we don't act so close in China, and I shouldn't lead her around by the back" though she clearly appreciates it sometimes. I tell her that that's just what I'm used to. I should have mentioned the couples I see openly making out and holding hands.

Another way to handle this is to tell her that if she didn't look so good, you wouldn't want to touch her so it's her fault. Also, you could tell her that next time she shouldn't take a shower and wear dirty close and she won't have to worry about that happening anymore.

On 10/26/2018 at 12:38 AM, Ditto said:

We take a couple pictures with new filters(?) she's found and I snap a few because she has me hold the phone, and on the third one I squeeze her ass

I wouldn't do this with any girl I haven't already had sex with. Asian girls are EXTREMELY worried about their public image and when you regularly do things that embarrass them, they won't want to be around you. If you're going to do this sort of thing, you should do it in a semi-private place like a stairwell or elevator that only the two of you are in, for example.

They'll still be embarrassed, but when you show that you're aware of the social situation, they'll feel comfortable.

On 10/26/2018 at 12:38 AM, Ditto said:

I text her that she has a nice butt by the way

Almost guaranteed to trigger ASD. What were you hoping to accomplish?

On 10/26/2018 at 12:38 AM, Ditto said:

I should really not write up so much at once, it ends up being way too long and I worry I miss some important details regardless

Agreed. You should have written the HBSpasticDancerGirl and HB BathroomFriendGirl in separate posts, and save this just for approaches.

On 10/26/2018 at 12:38 AM, Ditto said:

-I will try to push through fluff talk for more attraction, qualification, and comfort

YES!

On 10/26/2018 at 12:38 AM, Ditto said:

-I need to focus on how to progress the sarge much faster and more smoothly, because an average of not even close to closing on the D4 is not where I want to be.

It seems that the issue is that you didn't plan a sexcalation location into your day 4 plan.  Whenever you plan your meets, you should plan around getting them to the close location, whether that's THIS meet, or if you want to use a particular meet to make sure you'll be able to get them to the close location easily the next time.

Somehow, I missed this post...sorry about that!

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On 11/1/2018 at 7:04 AM, RedpoleQ said:
On 10/25/2018 at 8:38 AM, Ditto said:

I let her choose the restaurant (I really need to stop doing that)

Yes, you do. This is a great way to end up in all sorts of bad situations.

Yeah I was just trying to get her out and get practice, but I realize now it's better to do it right and risk not having it happen, because that means I need to do something else better

On 11/1/2018 at 7:04 AM, RedpoleQ said:
  On 10/25/2018 at 8:38 AM, Ditto said:

The choker necklace thing got way harder after I explicitly mentioned it though.

I mean that I told her we should go get her one, and that it could be an activity. But I was set on the idea and didn't pick up that she thought it was too boyfriend/girlfriend, whereas I could have let it be and just positively reinforced similar behaviors

On 11/1/2018 at 7:04 AM, RedpoleQ said:
On 10/25/2018 at 8:38 AM, Ditto said:

Turns out she's a conservative medical student and serious about only dating one person

Ummm...what makes you think she's conservative? Because she said she is? Don't listen to what women say about themselves...they're busy managing their image.  Remember the Madonna/Whore dichotomy? She's on the way to a date and gives out her number to a random dude. WARNING! WHORE! 

So, she tells you that she's conservative or whatever which feeds your ego by making you feel extra special and also makes her feel like she's framing herself as Madonna enough that you will respect her.

She did say explicitly that she's conservative and thinks that "there's no chance for us," that she can only date one person at a time.

"WARNING! WHORE! " LOL! That one had me laughing for a while. Great point though, I didn't even notice that. I thought it was all my irresistible charm 😂

On 11/1/2018 at 7:04 AM, RedpoleQ said:
On 10/25/2018 at 8:38 AM, Ditto said:

I also find out a few days later that this girl is engaged haha

Lols. She told you or you saw it on her WeChat or something? Anyway, since you're leaving, it's perfect for her. All the evidence of infidelity will fly away and she doesn't have much time to party before it's time to get knocked up and pop out a baby.

Her coworker from the same set told me over WeChat. I guess my situation would have been very convenient for her, though I had been telling the girls I intended to go back to Shanghai to look for work, which I am seriously considering, so maybe she thought that would ruin the convenience

 

On 11/1/2018 at 7:04 AM, RedpoleQ said:

You shouldn't say date in any country. It makes it too formal and serious. You want it to be as casual as possible whereas saying it's a "date" puts a lot of expectations and it also means that the girl has to have romantic intentions towards you which she may no be comfortable acknowledging.

I guess it's not getting 'swept off your feet' if the guy drops all the dating frames on her before she even decides if she likes him huh. This is getting nixed in all respects as of now. 

Though when do you start to really show intent? During sexcalation when you home bounce her? Just don't do anything that could make her think you want to sleep with her until you're actually there at the SL?

On 11/1/2018 at 7:04 AM, RedpoleQ said:
On 10/25/2018 at 8:38 AM, Ditto said:

She's just always doing something frivolous, no wonder she is always too tired to meet late at night. She wants to stand up and do the waltz in the restaurant.

This is also called, HAVING FUN! And is a great quality in a girl who you have communication problems with.

I think this is actually probably a limiting belief for me, I had seen how unstable girls who acted like this in high school were emotionally with their boyfriends and it affects my judgement now. I should have just gone with it and just upped my energy level to hyper too and seen how it went.

On 11/1/2018 at 7:04 AM, RedpoleQ said:

This is NORMAL traditional female behavior. Why? If you can't afford it, then why should she want to date you? If you can't afford a steak dinner, how could you afford to take care of her and the kids, right? 

The bigger problem is that you allowed yourself to be in this situation, in the first place. This is exactly why you should decide where to go and not leave it up to girls. She may not be "using" you. This might be totally normal for her and the guys she dates. Also, you need to remember that Asia does't have all this western hogwash about male/female equality, where men are men and women are men too.

If you're not happy with women playing a more traditional role, then you'll need to stick to westernized women...I would't recommend it though 🤮

True, I guess I just never figured out how to deal with it because I was raised to insist on paying anyway. I wanted to change that and let it ruin my game, thought I could be as straightforward as TheRomantic and crew. I'm learning at least though, and for that I'm happy!

I'm happy with women playing both traditional and non traditional roles, honestly I'm happy if she's happy (and attractive, and has similar moral guidelines, and wakes up at exactly 5:40 every morning to make herself perfect.)

On 11/1/2018 at 7:04 AM, RedpoleQ said:

Don't make it transactional, tell her that next time it will be on you. I know you're cheap, but don't appear cheap. It's very unattractive.

On 10/25/2018 at 8:38 AM, Ditto said:

I push for her to come back to my place to watch a movie (that I didn't seed) and get her money.

This is pretty good. You should have led with this.  "Sorry about that...I have more cash back at my place, so we can go back and get it." That's a pretty decent (though arguably dark) home bounce plan.

AH, that is a good one hah! Dark? Okay, I never knew how to get around that because I'd always just admit to being cheap so they knew what to expect, but then I'd pay. I just wouldn't go buying a bunch of overpriced candy or teddy bears.

On 11/1/2018 at 7:04 AM, RedpoleQ said:

She's not attractive enough to take our for coffee? Most of the problems you had with this girl were of your own making. You should never take a girl to a place where you'd be unhappy about having to pay the full bill and you're not required to give her levels of compliance you don't want to.

You're right. I let her dictate where to meet and where to go, and I gave her way too much compliance up front simply because I wanted to meet and she seemed keen.

Though one question, if she's trying to push for places that are easy for her to go and I don't want to go (or take the time to plan a d2 in a far away location I won't go many times,) what is a good response? Just say "nah not tonight" and push for a better location for me next time? It seems strange to tell them where I'm staying and telling them to meet by me even though they're far away.

She is attractive enough, I was just thinking I could deal with her levels of energy much more easily if I could do more kino and not be worried about her thinking other people are judging her.

On 11/1/2018 at 7:04 AM, RedpoleQ said:

It's also better to train girls to send you pics directly than to have to download them like some pervy stalker, lols.

Okay I thought so too 😄

On 11/1/2018 at 7:04 AM, RedpoleQ said:

Another way to handle this is to tell her that if she didn't look so good, you wouldn't want to touch her so it's her fault. Also, you could tell her that next time she shouldn't take a shower and wear dirty close and she won't have to worry about that happening anymore.

Haha! I'll try this one next time, not many easy comebacks to that one.

On 11/1/2018 at 7:04 AM, RedpoleQ said:

I wouldn't do this with any girl I haven't already had sex with. Asian girls are EXTREMELY worried about their public image and when you regularly do things that embarrass them, they won't want to be around you. If you're going to do this sort of thing, you should do it in a semi-private place like a stairwell or elevator that only the two of you are in, for example.

They'll still be embarrassed, but when you show that you're aware of the social situation, they'll feel comfortable.

Oh. That makes sense. I think the first step for me IS being aware of the social situation. Though all of this helps with that a lot, because you're clearly pointing out things that I do not realize at all. So thanks!

On 11/1/2018 at 7:04 AM, RedpoleQ said:
On 10/25/2018 at 8:38 AM, Ditto said:

I text her that she has a nice butt by the way

Almost guaranteed to trigger ASD. What were you hoping to accomplish?

I was trying to give her a story about what I did earlier, and that it was lighthearted and fun, and that I enjoy her as a person and as a sexual object. I did not think about the people (who were few and far between, but that doesn't matter in her mind) just like I forgot before, and that was probably a bigger problem.

On 11/1/2018 at 7:04 AM, RedpoleQ said:

Agreed. You should have written the HBSpasticDancerGirl and HB BathroomFriendGirl in separate posts, and save this just for approaches.

Ah makes sense. Next time I will follow this format.

On 11/1/2018 at 7:04 AM, RedpoleQ said:
On 10/25/2018 at 8:38 AM, Ditto said:

-I will try to push through fluff talk for more attraction, qualification, and comfort

YES!

!!!

On 11/1/2018 at 7:04 AM, RedpoleQ said:

It seems that the issue is that you didn't plan a sexcalation location into your day 4 plan.  Whenever you plan your meets, you should plan around getting them to the close location, whether that's THIS meet, or if you want to use a particular meet to make sure you'll be able to get them to the close location easily the next time.

True, I didn't expect it to last long but you're right. I should make sure I have the option because if I know one thing, it's that I don't know... much, at least not enough to say what is or isn't likely to happen

On 11/1/2018 at 7:04 AM, RedpoleQ said:

This is why you shouldn't let girls pick. Ask in the group chat for day 2 ideas!

 

On 11/1/2018 at 7:04 AM, RedpoleQ said:

The bigger problem is that you allowed yourself to be in this situation, in the first place. This is exactly why you should decide where to go and not leave it up to girls.

 

On 11/1/2018 at 7:04 AM, RedpoleQ said:

I'm equally baffled...

You're completely right, this is one of the things I am going to focus on until I don't even feel the urge to let her dictate the logistics or d2 anymore.

On 11/1/2018 at 7:04 AM, RedpoleQ said:

Somehow, I missed this post...sorry about that!

No problem! I always really appreciate the feedback, late or not!

 

My biggest focuses for the immediate future are going to be on leading the interaction while making sure I give compliance as a reward, being aware of the girls perception of the social situation (and learning how far I can push things past social expectations and in what ways), and fleshing out my stack and memorizing it, and adding a lot more of the stories I tell so I can tweak them better.

Onward!

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On 11/3/2018 at 5:52 PM, Ditto said:

Her coworker from the same set told me over WeChat

How did you end up with the co-worker's WeChat? If the co-worker is a guy, he's probably cockblocking. If it's a girl, maybe they're trying to target switch you...

On 11/3/2018 at 5:52 PM, Ditto said:

Though when do you start to really show intent? During sexcalation when you home bounce her? Just don't do anything that could make her think you want to sleep with her until you're actually there at the SL?

You can show intent...that's totally different from it being a "date". Intent and interest to bang is one thing. But a "date" has all sorts of bad and boring connotations attached to it. "I want to bang you, let's hang out at the park and see how we like each other" is a lot better than, "I want to bang you, let's go on a date."

On 11/3/2018 at 5:52 PM, Ditto said:

I had seen how unstable girls who acted like this in high school were emotionally with their boyfriends and it affects my judgement now

Their boyfriends also don't know how to manage them too.

On 11/3/2018 at 5:52 PM, Ditto said:

I'm happy with women playing both traditional and non traditional roles, honestly I'm happy if she's happy (and attractive, and has similar moral guidelines, and wakes up at exactly 5:40 every morning to make herself perfect.)

Hahahahahahahahahaha

On 11/3/2018 at 5:52 PM, Ditto said:

I'd always just admit to being cheap

Even if you are cheap, don't let girls think you're cheap. Actually, being "cheap" is a bad trait all around. And you're not actually cheap. Because you do spend money if you see the value, hence you took the boot camp and the sex seminar. You just don't want to waste money and want to make sure you get value for money.

So you should reframe how you see yourself, because girls are pretty comfortable with a guy being willing to spend money on quality.

On 11/3/2018 at 5:52 PM, Ditto said:

Though one question, if she's trying to push for places that are easy for her to go and I don't want to go (or take the time to plan a d2 in a far away location I won't go many times,) what is a good response? Just say "nah not tonight" and push for a better location for me next time? It seems strange to tell them where I'm staying and telling them to meet by me even though they're far away.

What's more important? Seeming normal, or getting what you want? Ultimately, it doesn't matter. You just should understand that jumping through a girl's hoops doesn't necessarily mean that you're more likely to close. It only means you'll be more likely to get the meet. So, you need to consider whether you're willing to give that level of compliance for the meet.

Also, keep in mind that if she "seemed keen" then she's MORE likely to give you the compliance you want. In fact, the amount of compliance you can get IS the measure for keeness.

On 11/3/2018 at 5:52 PM, Ditto said:
On 11/1/2018 at 11:04 PM, RedpoleQ said:

I wouldn't do this with any girl I haven't already had sex with. Asian girls are EXTREMELY worried about their public image and when you regularly do things that embarrass them, they won't want to be around you. If you're going to do this sort of thing, you should do it in a semi-private place like a stairwell or elevator that only the two of you are in, for example.

They'll still be embarrassed, but when you show that you're aware of the social situation, they'll feel comfortable.

Oh. That makes sense. I think the first step for me IS being aware of the social situation. Though all of this helps with that a lot, because you're clearly pointing out things that I do not realize at all. So thanks!

That's exactly why EVERYONE should be posting like you are.

On 11/3/2018 at 5:52 PM, Ditto said:

You're completely right, this is one of the things I am going to focus on until I don't even feel the urge to let her dictate the logistics or d2 anymore.

This is usually a result of over-confidence, laziness or BOTH!

On 11/3/2018 at 5:52 PM, Ditto said:

My biggest focuses for the immediate future are going to be on leading the interaction while making sure I give compliance as a reward, being aware of the girls perception of the social situation (and learning how far I can push things past social expectations and in what ways), and fleshing out my stack and memorizing it, and adding a lot more of the stories I tell so I can tweak them better.

Sounds great!

Good work and keep at it!

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41 minutes ago, RedpoleQ said:

How did you end up with the co-worker's WeChat? If the co-worker is a guy, he's probably cockblocking. If it's a girl, maybe they're trying to target switch you...

It was the 3 set of models I opened at some event I walked by. The girl I decided to target because she spoke english said she was lesbian, and so I got her coworkers wechat too (she offered to help me)

43 minutes ago, RedpoleQ said:

You can show intent...that's totally different from it being a "date". Intent and interest to bang is one thing. But a "date" has all sorts of bad and boring connotations attached to it. "I want to bang you, let's hang out at the park and see how we like each other" is a lot better than, "I want to bang you, let's go on a date."

When you put it that way it makes perfect sense haha! I was wondering about other things that could trigger ASD, though now that I've thought about it I just need to think carefully about whether or not I could with my actions. And to calibrate via experience too

45 minutes ago, RedpoleQ said:
On 11/3/2018 at 1:52 AM, Ditto said:

I had seen how unstable girls who acted like this in high school were emotionally with their boyfriends and it affects my judgement now

Their boyfriends also don't know how to manage them too.

That does make sense, I forget sometimes my aim is to be far better than the average guy at dealing with girls

47 minutes ago, RedpoleQ said:

Even if you are cheap, don't let girls think you're cheap. Actually, being "cheap" is a bad trait all around. And you're not actually cheap. Because you do spend money if you see the value, hence you took the boot camp and the sex seminar. You just don't want to waste money and want to make sure you get value for money.

So you should reframe how you see yourself, because girls are pretty comfortable with a guy being willing to spend money on quality.

You are right that is both true, and better. I just have to think about how to say it without sounding like I'm defending being a miser haha

1 hour ago, RedpoleQ said:
On 11/3/2018 at 1:52 AM, Ditto said:

It seems strange to tell them where I'm staying and telling them to meet by me even though they're far away.

What's more important? Seeming normal, or getting what you want? Ultimately, it doesn't matter. You just should understand that jumping through a girl's hoops doesn't necessarily mean that you're more likely to close. It only means you'll be more likely to get the meet. So, you need to consider whether you're willing to give that level of compliance for the meet.

Also, keep in mind that if she "seemed keen" then she's MORE likely to give you the compliance you want. In fact, the amount of compliance you can get IS the measure for keeness.

Okay, so what I need to do is decide my own willingness to give compliance and make a baseline. Though, rather than seeming strange, maybe it'd be better to say that it seems like giving low compliance would reduce her willingness to give compliance in return.

Right! Which is back to how value (and keenness as her perceived value of you) and compliance are two sides of the same thing like you said in bootcamp. The light bulb just turned on lol

On 11/6/2018 at 2:14 AM, RedpoleQ said:

That's exactly why EVERYONE should be posting like you are.

Haha does this mean I get to join in on the "you should write an FR about it" train?

On 11/6/2018 at 2:14 AM, RedpoleQ said:
On 11/3/2018 at 1:52 AM, Ditto said:

You're completely right, this is one of the things I am going to focus on until I don't even feel the urge to let her dictate the logistics or d2 anymore.

This is usually a result of over-confidence, laziness or BOTH!

It was both. 😵 That won't be happening again any time soon though!

On 11/6/2018 at 2:14 AM, RedpoleQ said:

Sounds great!

Good work and keep at it!

Thanks!

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On 11/8/2018 at 11:14 PM, Ditto said:

Okay, so what I need to do is decide my own willingness to give compliance and make a baseline. Though, rather than seeming strange, maybe it'd be better to say that it seems like giving low compliance would reduce her willingness to give compliance in return.

Right! Which is back to how value (and keenness as her perceived value of you) and compliance are two sides of the same thing like you said in bootcamp. The light bulb just turned on lol

Perfect!

On 11/8/2018 at 11:14 PM, Ditto said:

Haha does this mean I get to join in on the "you should write an FR about it" train?

Yup! Time to start schooling the no-FR writing n00bs!

Great replies and I'm looking forward to what's next.

 

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On 10/15/2018 at 3:42 AM, Ditto said:

Got the the hostel around 3, met my 70 year old roommate who was intent on teaching me advanced Chinese, ran about 50 minutes in the dark, so I was in a good mood

 

lol, of course you were.

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FR Thurs 14 Feb

Got off my flight in Chongqing with my brother and we were finding our way to the train to Chengdu/waiting for it. Did a few bitch opens where I just waved or did silly things as BT spikes to get back into it, asked for directions once but didn't WC close bc I didn't really intend to go back to chongqing.

One girl at the restaurant we went to was giving me a ton of smiles every time I looked at her, so I decided to go up to the register and give her my WC saying it was a better translator than me. It was an easy WC close but I was excited because I haven't been able to push myself to try and number close most girls working in such close proximity to their bosses because I didn't want to get them in trouble at work.

Decided to be cheesy and ask her to be my valentine later over WC and she said no haha, started doing the bit about "I hope you enjoy your trip back to America, I don't intend to see you again." Then I just made a bunch of comments implying how I meet a lot of girls and she's really keen again LOL. She's really great practice for things I wouldn't usually text girls

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Friday 15 FEB

Went to Chunxi lu with Limonaide and his friend for some day game. My goal was to find some girls I liked and to try to timebridge them, and to refrain from getting wechats of girls I wasn't interested in meeting.

First set Limonaide challenged me to approach a 1 set, maybe 2 minutes. Cat socks opener, either she left and I tried to get her to come back, or I left because I wasn't really interested. Good warm up though

2nd, again Limonaide encouragement, 1-2 minutes. Opened with do you speak English, will you help teach me. Could have been much more fluid with my words and BT spikes. Said thanks and ejected

3rd, opened a 3 set in the bookstore, at least 30 minutes. Opened the set, asked if the old looking sony cameras they had actually worked. They're traveling to Chengdu. Me too! I want to see their pictures. Target starts showing me pictures on her camera. Kino compliant but never pushed past BT spike arm touching and touching her hands. After some more BT spikes Limonaide and his friend let me know they were behind me and I tried to bring them in to wing, did some shuffling around of the girls and Limon got his girl to talk to him but one of the others followed my target with me and so I ran a two set the rest of the time. Did a lot of talking about the target through the obstacle and got into more comfort and asking about her studies and what they do. By the end she looked like she was trying to find ways to kino me back haha. Time bridged for coffee or a movie on Monday. Another girl walked up and asked if she could join us (how do you deal with this well? I wasn't interested) But then we were asked to move out of the aisle by a staff member so it saved us more or less.

4th, Went looking for a 3 set that I saw walking upstairs that I thought was cute but couldn't find them, opened a girl by trying to read her book. She smiled and laughed. High fived and left

5th, <5 mins, Outside, walking 2 set that looked really hot so I thought it was a great chance to potentially get blown out and at least reduce future AA. Cat socks opener, turned out to be her mom, did the "does your sister speak English" bit, mom looked unhappy but daughter was very ready to help and smiling. Was going to try hooking the mom more but she walked over to a menu at the nearby restaurant so I asked if they were going to eat. Yes. Daughter had informed me they're from guangdong, told her that's where my family is from. WC closed the daughter and said have a good dinner and see you later

6th, 3 to 5 min, Limonaide wanted to see how I opened a sitting 2 set. Sat down next to the obstacle on the half a seat worth of space left and asked if the targets hair was green or. Yes it's green. Why? Some answer I forget. Asked the obstacle some questions about the target and made a few comments about the weird seat. Asked why the target was shopping on her phone in a mall. (she wasn't actually) High fived both, said something nice, and left

7th, 5 or so mins, metro on the way back. Girl sitting. Your earrings are really big, did they hurt to put in? No English, she still gets the joke in chinese with some body language. I laugh, she tries to ask me a few things quietly that I didn't understand but I apologize for my chinese (which I should stop doing) Does she live in Chengdu? Yes. Nice. Do you have wechat? Do you want to give it to me? Okay, exchange just a minute before I get off. Smile, high five, and leave

 

Things I did well:

-Utilized my small Chinese vocabulary reasonably well

-Approached when I instinctively didn't want to

-Opened the whole set

-Good body language

-I had good qualification statements in a few cases, letting the girls know their traits were good for me

 

Things I will improve:

-I will open more sets that I find attractive, rather than debating myself too long

-I will remember to do logistics earlier in the interaction

-I will keep pushing my interactions to involve more game and less fluff talk

-I will seed more

-I will increase my vocabulary so I can better convey my DHVs and qualification

 

Realizations:

-I can hook sets that would have definitely blown me out 6 months ago!

-There are a lot of out of town girls during festival breaks, both benefits and drawbacks

-Getting past common small talk topics and to something both of us like can be exciting for her and is much more interesting for me

-I think my long hair has severely diminished the "are you here to kill me" type reactions. It's a lot easier to hook sets without girls asking what I want or what I'm doing

-Agreeing and then stating my different views is very effective

 

It was fun gaming with you and your friend Limonaide! I look forward to the next week haha!

 

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Sat 16 FEB

Went to do nightgame with Limonaide and his friend. Shincoc was having a sleepover or something :classic_biggrin: but we are excited to game with him next time haha!

There were a lot of sets, and I didn't hook a lot of them well and ejected, none were truly getting blown out though. But for that reason there are probably a good 30-50% of opens that I totally forgot.

 

Playhouse - big Chinese club with really loud edm music and is either dance floor or a sea of tables

2 min set, opened some girls playing a dice game at a table. Tried to get them to show me how to play, only really got 3 out of 4 of their attention initially. When I'd get one interested, I'd try to hook another, and the first would lose interest again. This went on for a bit, I tried to get Limonaide to open a different girl himself to effectively reduce the set size, but it still didn't hook

Did some more opens that didn't hook because I felt like I was killing the mood by not jumping up and down to the music (everyone around us stopped lol)

5-8 minute set, realized that the only way I would really be able to open and get a reaction that wasn't frustration at barely being able to hear/understand my chinese or english was to open nonverbally. Opened HB Danson With a smile and the hand of god opener plus a spin. I opened her across the obstacle and the obstacles seemed happy but then repositioned themselves behind the target. I tried to grab Limonaide and his friend as wings a bit in but I don't think it stuck too well. Tried some loud communication and she was leaning in to talk to me, but I forgot all of the things we said. She convinced me to "dance" by just jumping up and down, and seemed happy when I complied after a couple tries. Everything was BT spikes and maybe a bit of comfort. Obstacles wanted to go get drinks so I did my best to help guide her through the crowd (from the back) and WC closed her at the bar before going back to the dance floor to optimize my time opening sets.

3-5 minute 3 set, all the girls were a bit standoffish but still interacting and smiling. Turns out it was a 6 set and they were with their boyfriends. Boyfriend 1 gave me a thumbs up or something at one point and I was like "yeah high five!" then later I think I reopened the set and the boyfriend made it clear they were together. Then he tried to get me to join him in the jumping, I signaled that I wouldn't, smiled, waved to them all and moved on. (I assume this was the right move, as letting some random guy lead me would be a DLV right?)

1 minute set, solo set seems interested and is pretty cute, but is telling me no she doesn't want to dance together or do any handshakes or the like. I keep seeing her while in other sets and she keeps looking at me but I don't know what to do. Probably should have invited her out to a quieter area.

After that sets were more compliant as I was willing to "dance" and did entirely nonverbal openers for the most part. We made our way back and forth between sides of the dance floor and did some easy opens on the way for confidence and calibration. One 3 set that was actually pretty cute did the no thanks 2 handed wave and was persistent about not hooking even after a few spins and handshakes and other silly gestures I felt like doing at the time.

10-15 min set, We went outside to let our ear drums heal and for a quick chat about how to proceed. Limonaide opened a sitting 3 set with 1 guy. Opened across the guy and complimented him first, it was good. He brought me in to wing and I ran some BT spikes and comfort on the girl about where we lived and studied. Qualified her on her great drawing, that since I have no artistic ability I need someone who does to balance me out. (I was going to say so my kids can be talented at everything, but I'm still not sure if that's a really bad frame) I started losing momentum as I wasn't thinking at full speed and stopped thinking of things to say. BS palmreading fell through bc she actually knew how to palm read LOL. Limonaide and I discussed what to do across the set and decided to bounce them inside to dance and find their friends, their friends turned out to be guys and they invited us to their table. WC closed my girl and we went back to opening.

10-15 min set, Reopened HB Danson at the bar next to the dance floor and asked if she wanted to dance, lead her there and into the back where we were before. Jumped like goofballs for a minute, then I decided it'd be fun to go to the front where people were putting their hands on the plates over the speakers. Slid my way through the crowd taking her with me and even better, in front of the 3 set that didn't want to hook before. And we danced, I did whatever funny thing I felt like in a moment and made sure to keep turning to her and interacting with her or just smiling and copying her dancing. Seemed to go well, 3 set from before seemed a bit jealous too so that was fun. I also discovered I could enjoy this type of dancing, because I kept jumping like a nutcase long after everyone else's legs had started to give out and they were all just standing during the bass drops. Heh.  Said goodbye when it was time to go and motioned that I had to go with my friends, tried to smile a lot and kino for a happy last impression. She texted me later asking me to come back to the dance floor

 

Jellyfish

Did some silly shuffling through the crowd to the music, smiled a lot like RPQ told me to in bootcamp. Tons of good responses and 2 or 3 easy opens that I didn't know where to take or I decided to look for higher quality girls.

One 4 set lasted about 10 minutes, short girl reasonably cute, tried opening across the set and I should have gone for the one in the middle, even though I couldn't get proximity to her. Set went okay, target was pretty drunk and extremely compliant and wanted my attention. Turns out after 10 minutes or so, she had a boyfriend and the other girl might not have. How do you deal with that?

 

Moops? -Club with mostly tables, a bar in the main room, and a bouncing dancefloor

Opened a couple girls, they hooked, but it fell short on momentum because all I could do is jump around and most weren't interested in leaving the dancefloor so soon. I opened a few sets like this and the third hooked pretty well and was smiley and complaint. I can't remember, after about 15 minutes of jumping, their interest died down and they didn't want to go off the dance floor. It might have been my mental state or that I was starting to get off beat at some points too. Eventually ejected and looked for other sets but didn't hook most. Held up one of the frills on one girls dress and gave her an approving look, she seemed thoroughly conflicted and left haha

 

Jellyfish again

Opened a mixed 7 or 8 set on the dancefloor, my target and I had exchanged a couple of looks before and so I waved her over and she came, danced for me a bit and then took me back to her friends. Found out who she was there with by asking one of the guys, while complimenting them all. She was next to me but scooted to the other side of the circle as I tried to make sure the whole set was hooked. BT spiked them all a reasonable number of times and went off to go open some other girls while increasing preselection from my target.

While opening a mixed 3 set, a girl behind me spilled her drink on the back of my shirt. I kept thinking I could use that as an opener since she was relatively cute, but I couldn't think of what to do.

Ran into a 2 set of girls hugging, held out my arms for a hug from both. I thought it was funny but then one left and the other (a 4 or 5 at best in china) grabbed onto me and basically tried to rape me in the club. I figured I'd let her go at it for a minute or two just for the experience, but then the thought occurred to me to just directly ask her to leave and go to her place (my brother is staying at my airbnb with me.) She said wait a second and I said okay and went to look for my actual target. She was gone along with the whole set. I will say I regret nothing, but I regret it lol.

Opened a couple more sets, one 4 set I tried to bounce for food with my friends but they said they weren't hungry. Met Limonaide and co. and we talked about his set and what to do for a bit and then the one who was intent on having my babies walked outside and I told her let's go together, I wanted some practice for the things I learned in the sex seminar even if I had to sacrifice a bit of my pride for it. The practice was pretty awful. LR coming soon

 

Things I did well:

-Made sure to make use of preselection by showing off the cute girls I hooked around the clubs, and high fiving the dudes I'd given face when they walked by

-Did some silly openers that I enjoyed, and with good body language for the most part

-Opened a lot of sets

-Calibrated kino a bit better as I went along

 

Things I will improve:

-I will open more girls I think are hot that are low chance even if they're in a bad position to approach

-I will pick my target BEFORE opening the set as much as possible, and learn how to open across a set but still keep my target interested

-I will be more persistent in sets that seem interested but feel awkward or are giving both positive and negative feedback. Because I shouldn't really bother too much with that in getting what I want anyway

-I will try to make sure all interactions I have are a DHV

 

Realizations:

-Night game is hard, but not as hard as I thought at the beginning of the night

-Kino compliance in night game while dancing is a funny beast it seems, touching is more okay, but you can trigger resistance almost more easily than in daygame, probably because girls there are used to shutting guys down

-I have no idea how to progress the sarge well in loud environments. Is the only goal in an extremely loud room to build enough attraction to bounce somewhere quieter? I assume you can't seed that bounce really if they can't understand your english, and all vocal communication is much slower and more deliberate.

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On 2/15/2019 at 4:38 PM, Ditto said:

Got off my flight in Chongqing with my brother and we were finding our way to the train to Chengdu/waiting for it. Did a few bitch opens where I just waved or did silly things as BT spikes to get back into it, asked for directions once but didn't WC close bc I didn't really intend to go back to chongqing.

One girl at the restaurant we went to was giving me a ton of smiles every time I looked at her, so I decided to go up to the register and give her my WC saying it was a better translator than me. It was an easy WC close but I was excited because I haven't been able to push myself to try and number close most girls working in such close proximity to their bosses because I didn't want to get them in trouble at work.

Decided to be cheesy and ask her to be my valentine later over WC and she said no haha, started doing the bit about "I hope you enjoy your trip back to America, I don't intend to see you again." Then I just made a bunch of comments implying how I meet a lot of girls and she's really keen again LOL. She's really great practice for things I wouldn't usually text girls

Perfect.

When you're feeling chodey, you should just do whatever you can do to get the ball rolling....or...slightly shifting forwards.

Her reaction of i dont intend to see you again' is usually just a lack of comfort, also how did you phrase the 'be my valentine'?

From her perspective, it may come across as 'lets fuck on valentines day'.

You did a good job by just starting.

 

On 2/16/2019 at 1:51 AM, Ditto said:

Went to Chunxi lu with Limonaide and his friend for some day game. My goal was to find some girls I liked and to try to timebridge them, and to refrain from getting wechats of girls I wasn't interested in meeting.

First set Limonaide challenged me to approach a 1 set, maybe 2 minutes. Cat socks opener, either she left and I tried to get her to come back, or I left because I wasn't really interested. Good warm up though

2nd, again Limonaide encouragement, 1-2 minutes. Opened with do you speak English, will you help teach me. Could have been much more fluid with my words and BT spikes. Said thanks and ejected

3rd, opened a 3 set in the bookstore, at least 30 minutes. Opened the set, asked if the old looking sony cameras they had actually worked. They're traveling to Chengdu. Me too! I want to see their pictures. Target starts showing me pictures on her camera. Kino compliant but never pushed past BT spike arm touching and touching her hands. After some more BT spikes Limonaide and his friend let me know they were behind me and I tried to bring them in to wing, did some shuffling around of the girls and Limon got his girl to talk to him but one of the others followed my target with me and so I ran a two set the rest of the time. Did a lot of talking about the target through the obstacle and got into more comfort and asking about her studies and what they do. By the end she looked like she was trying to find ways to kino me back haha. Time bridged for coffee or a movie on Monday. Another girl walked up and asked if she could join us (how do you deal with this well? I wasn't interested) But then we were asked to move out of the aisle by a staff member so it saved us more or less.

Sounds like you were doing well.

Who was the other girl?

You can deal with it by involving her in the convo and using her to enhance it, either by pushing her to talk about herself or to tell you about the other people if she knows them.

 

On 2/16/2019 at 1:51 AM, Ditto said:

4th, Went looking for a 3 set that I saw walking upstairs that I thought was cute but couldn't find them, opened a girl by trying to read her book. She smiled and laughed. High fived and left

5th, <5 mins, Outside, walking 2 set that looked really hot so I thought it was a great chance to potentially get blown out and at least reduce future AA. Cat socks opener, turned out to be her mom, did the "does your sister speak English" bit, mom looked unhappy but daughter was very ready to help and smiling. Was going to try hooking the mom more but she walked over to a menu at the nearby restaurant so I asked if they were going to eat. Yes. Daughter had informed me they're from guangdong, told her that's where my family is from. WC closed the daughter and said have a good dinner and see you later

6th, 3 to 5 min, Limonaide wanted to see how I opened a sitting 2 set. Sat down next to the obstacle on the half a seat worth of space left and asked if the targets hair was green or. Yes it's green. Why? Some answer I forget. Asked the obstacle some questions about the target and made a few comments about the weird seat. Asked why the target was shopping on her phone in a mall. (she wasn't actually) High fived both, said something nice, and left

7th, 5 or so mins, metro on the way back. Girl sitting. Your earrings are really big, did they hurt to put in? No English, she still gets the joke in chinese with some body language. I laugh, she tries to ask me a few things quietly that I didn't understand but I apologize for my chinese (which I should stop doing) Does she live in Chengdu? Yes. Nice. Do you have wechat? Do you want to give it to me? Okay, exchange just a minute before I get off. Smile, high five, and leave

 

Why did you just leave if you were getting compliance?

5th - sounds reasonable, have you followed up with her?

6th Were you not interested? or?

7th Nice bt spike.

You should pretend you understand and offer some answer and then if its wrong she will clairfy.

Smooth interactions are more important than her understanding everything or you understanding everything completely.

Yeah stop apologizing for your poor Chinese.

How's the follow up with all of this chicks?

 

 

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