As a foreigner in Korea, it may often feel intimidating to approach the beautiful Korean girls you see out every day. Sometimes you might see a girl you REALLY want to meet, but just don’t know what to say or how to talk to her in a way that would make her feel interested in or attracted to you.
This article will share the best spots to meet Korean girls and how approach the girls you’d like to date.
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Where to Find Korean Girls
One of the great things about Korea (especially in Seoul) is the sheer volume of girls you can see and meet at all times. If you go an area like Gangnam, Hongdae or Itaewon, you’ll have plenty of cute Korean girls you can talk to.
Bookstores and Cafes
Cafes and bookstores are great locations to approach because usually, when girls are in these spots they have a lot of free time! When you stop a girl on the street, she might be in a rush and you won’t have much time to have a conversation. If you see a girl sitting down at a cafe with her laptop out, then she’s probably planning to be there for a couple hours, so it’s an ideal time to start a conversation.
Street
Street game is probably the toughest form of cold approach pickup to do in Korea. It requires the highest level of skill, but also offers some of the best volume in terms of girls you can approach.
The main reason for the difficulty of street game is that girls you see on the street are often going somewhere and might be too busy to have a full conversation. You also need to get girls to stop, which means you need to have your game really dialed in.
Nightlife
Korean night life is absolutely INSANE! Korean people love to party and there is no shortage of nightlife venues to meet Korean girls in Seoul. Clubs and bars also stay open quite late, giving you plenty of chances to meet Korean girls after dark!
If you’re new to Korea, then Itaewon is one of the best nightlife areas to start with. It’s generally the most foreign-friendly nightlife area in Seoul and probably has the highest percentage of English-speaking Korean girls. So, if you’re not yet comfortable with your Korean language ability, Itaewon can be a great place to start.
Some of the popular bars and clubs in Itaewon to meet girls are Thursday Party, Glam, Fountain and B1.
The Gangnam area is also a great nightlife area, but recently they’ve been quite strict about letting foreigners into some of the clubs.
Two of the longest running and best pickup venues in the Gangnam area are MASS and Octagon night clubs.
Since you may often be rejected from some of the more popular nightclubs in the Gangnam area, approaching girls on the street nearby the popular clubs can also be a great idea.
How to Approach Korean Girls
Now that you know some of the areas and venues where you can meet Korean girls, we’ll talk about how to actually approach them and start a conversation.
Can I meet and date Korean girls without speaking Korean?
One of the most common questions asked by foreigners in Korea is if it’s possible to meet and date local Korean girls if you’re from a foreign country and are not fluent in Korean.
The answer is YES! It is definitely possible to date Korean girls without speaking fluent Korean. However, you will have a definite advantage if you’re willing to spend time learning the language and understanding the culture.
It’s important to remember that all Korean people study English in school when they’re growing up. So, they all have a basic understanding of the English language and have basic English conversation ability. The main problem is that they don’t need to use English every day, so they may feel uncomfortable or shy to speak the language with a foreigner.
Here are the three MOST IMPORTANT things you can do to avoid language barrier problems if you don’t speak Korean yet:
- Speak slowly – If you are a native English speaker, your habit is most-likely to speak very quickly. Instead, slow down your speech as much as possible. Speak. With. A. Pause. In. Between. Each Word.
- Use Simple English – Start your conversations by speaking at a kindergarten level. Some girls will have great English ability and, if that’s the case, you can use more complicated terms. But your default mode should be super simple English.
- Use body language – Use your hands and body to show what you’re talking about. For example, if you ask someone what time it is you can point to your wrist and then shrug to suggest you want to know the time.
- Use facial expressions – The ability to show a wide range of emotions is a very attractive quality, especially for Asian girls. Try to make exaggerated facial expressions to communicate different emotions like happiness, sadness, surprise, etc.
What to do when Korean girls say ‘no English’
It’s important to remember that when girls say something like “I can’t speak English”, she’s not necessarily rejecting you. She may just feel worried about her English skill level.
If she says she can’t understand English, you want to show her that you won’t judge her and that you can understand her well. Show her that the language barrier won’t be a problem for communication.
When you follow the advice listed above and are speaking very slowly while using lots of facial expressions and body language, then the girl will probably relax a bit and be more open to having a conversation with you.
If you’re still having a problem with communication while doing all of the things listed above, you can also open Google translate and use that to make conversation easier for her.
How should I start a conversation with a Korean girl?
There are many different openers you can use with Korean girls. The easiest and most natural way to start a conversation is to approach her with something situational.
Start with something fun and situational
When you approach girls, you want them to be having fun and to enjoy the interaction. Always approach with a smile and start with something light and funny.
If there’s something situational that you can comment on, you can also use that. For example, if a girl is eating cake at a cafe, you could ask her if it tastes good. If you see a big crowd of people, you could approach a girl and ask what’s going on.
When you pay attention to your surroundings, you can often come up with lots of situational things you can use to start a conversation.
Here are some examples of fun openers you can use with Korean girls:
- Who is your favorite Kakaotalk [Korean messaging app] character? I love Peach!
- Korean people love coffee shops! Where is the best one in this area?
- I want to take my friends to eat jjimdak [Korean chicken dish]. Where do you recommend?
Show some empathy and understanding
It’s very important to understand how the girl feels when you approach her. Being able to show some empathy and understanding for her situation will make her feel much more comfortable talking to you. Especially if you’re doing cold approach pickup where the girl has no idea who you are.
In NLP, this concept is called “pacing” and it’s one of the ways you can establish rapport with people. In general, if someone shows some empathy when they talk to us, we feel like they understand us.
For example, if you see a girl in a cafe and she’s studying, you can start a conversation like this:
Hey, I know you must be really busy studying, but I was wondering where I can get good jjimdak [a Korean chicken dish] in this area. Do you have somewhere you like?
The part in bold is where you’re pacing her reality and showing some empathy for her situation.
A basic structure for opening in Korea
It’s always a good idea to have a game plan or to have some sort of reliable structure you can use when you do game. That way you don’t lock up and forget what to say. Sometimes when you’re talking to girls, it’s easy to get stuck in your head or not know what to do next.
When you’re having a first conversation with a girl you might want to date it’s important to do all three of these things:
- Gather more information about HER. Find out who she is and what her life is like.
- Give her more information about herself. Show her why you’re someone worth knowing or dating.
- Try and set another time to meet and continue your interaction. Or invite her somewhere right then (for example, bring her to have coffee with you or ask if she wants to join you and your friends for dinner).
One of the easiest ways to begin a conversation is to have an outline for what to do. One of the things we often teach our students if they have trouble remembering what to say is give them a simple three-step structure for starting conversations.
We call this structure ICQ, or “Initiate, Compliment, Question”:
- Initiate – Approach the girl (ie. walk up to her and smile)
- Compliment – Comment on something interesting about the girl, or use a situational opener like the ones listed above.
- Question – What are you doing today? Any fun plans?
The great thing about this structure is that if you make it through all three steps and the girl is still talking with you, then you’ll know that she’s quite engaged and you can direct the conversation from there.
Once you’ve finished with ICQ, you can start sharing info about yourself and finding out more about her.
