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It's not that you ALWAYS have to pay. You have to consider the dynamic. Generally, if she's a student and you're working, you should pay. If she's also working than going dutch can be OK, though I tend to think that the bigger the age gap the less OK it is to go dutch. Looking cheap is extremely unattractive and an age gap with no money to show for it is DOUBLY unattractive. But it also depends on the culture. So in Japan, and Korea, going dutch is fairly common. But it's much more rare in China because Chinese are newly rich and men have significantly more earning power than women in addition to the fact that a man's financial means are still a major part of selection criteria. I think that the larger the middle class the less common that is because middle class men and women tend to have similar earning power. In general, I think that a more elegant solution is to pay for something, and then have her pay for the next thing. If you do want her to throw in some cash, I've found the best way to handle it is to say something like, "Do you have x amount?" where x amount is between a 3rd and a half of the total. That way, if she doesn't she can say no, and gracefully extricate herself and you don't look cheap because you actually do have and are willing to pay.

I wouldn't consider this to be forceful. It's really the best way to start because it's easy to access and it high a high chance of turning her on quickly. This means that your qualification is weak. It is the most difficult phase in pickup to get good at (in my opinion) so it's understandable, but it's something ot focus on more. Yeah, I missed these in my read over. How did she respond to these? It's VERY, VERY rare for girls not to put up some kind of resistance. It's not the west and there has been on sexual revolution so even if they're totally down, they usually put up some level of resistance just to not appear slutty. Asian guys don't respect girls who like sex (except in Japan). The day after we swapped contact information she messaged me, I sent her a picture of some spaghetti I was eating, she said that she wanted to eat some food that I made, and when I asked her what her schedule is, she didn't respond. This is normal behavior. How long before you followed up again with her? I think that this attitude might be holding you back from being more successful because instead of working hard at figuring out how and what you could do better you're letting yourself off the hook by saying that it's good to play it cool and not be interested. It is good not to care too much, but to improve you have to really want to get better and focus on it and think about it a lot. The fact is that each particular girl is a great lesson for us to learn and improve from, but if we're not pushing ourselves then we won't get the lesson. This may not be the case with you, but I'm pointing it out just in case.

This is a very difficult situation because she's one of your students so she could have all sorts of hidden motives for her behavior. If this were a girl from cold approach or an introduction, I would say that you definitely could have closed her. She gave what seems like VERY token resistance that you could have easily gotten past by turning her on more and being more persistent. Since she's your student though, I wouldn't advise the same kind of tactics and I think you need much clearer signals. First off though, it sounds like you really should have been working her neck and ears a lot more, because it sounds like you went straight for her legs. Also, future projection is woefully missing. Also, not a lot of qualification. Sure you let her know you appreciate her for the things you did, but you didn't let her know that you appreciate any unique qualities about who she is as a person--at least from what you wrote here. Not setting the next meet was a major mistake, but really, with no future projection, it's hard to imagine how you would have set it up. I think that your intentions for this girl need to be a lot more clear. Like are you trying to date her, or you just want her to come over and have sex with you occasionally or you just want to close her once or..? Because maybe being more overt about everything with her, verbally would have been the way to go. Really hard to say though, because for all I know, she's just trying to get good English class grades and thinks that if the teacher thinks he'll get some, she will. I was also wondering why so many weeks passed before you set up the meet since she seems to have come on pretty strong in the beginning...