FR: HB9: Waitress

[Solid]

So the background to this story is I am a poker player who saw this cute waitress at the casino. She is 23 years old has a rocking body and seemed pretty flirtatious with me. We hang out a couple times and she is touchy feely but being a newb, I bitched out everytime I get signs. Fast forward, I dig myself into another hole by expressing my feelings for her and she rejected it saying that she can't see me with her ever after thinking about it for a couple days. I sounded very disappointed to her on the phone but the third time I see her she gets drunk and is giving me a lot of sexual attention. She comes to the front of my house but silly me tries to be the responsible guy and takes her home.

 

Next day she says that she doesn't see me as a man and I don't see her as a woman. She keeps on treating me like a lil bitch by saying condescending things but I keep trying to get one more meet. She is definitely not text responsive but she comes out.

 

I see her and we go out to a bar I know and she says she won't be drinking a lot. I told her I wanted to talk to her and got more serious. I was really nervous and it was pretty awkward in the beginning but she played it off cool and was talkative. We start drinking a lot more and she is touchy feely. I tell her that I care about her a lot and I want the best for her even though its not with me. I tell her that I'm okay to be friends to open up the door for the future if she comes around.

 

I bounce her back to my place and tell her to come in. She said she need to use the bathroom and I tell her that I messed up the other night and I want to show you whose the man. I try to get as sexual as possible. She comes to my house and after coming out of the bathroom 5 minutes I see her lying on my bed. I get next to her and start trying to get more sexual. She isn't having it so I just take off my clothes. She rolls around and I keep trying to plow through. She keeps saying "no" but I keep pushing and then I ask her "really?" She starts to shed a couple tears here and there and thats when I tell her to calm down and its okay. I want to do it because i am really attracted to her and I apologize that she's crying and feel bad but I don't apologize for my actions.

 

She keeps on saying she will go home by herself but later she tells me to take her home. During the car ride back she was sniffling but seemed fine. She was still light kinoing my arm and were having good conversation. I was telling her about give her a squirting orgasm and she was curious to know what it was. She said that I must be good in bed. We had our laughs then a police pulls us over for drinking. After a bit of talking the police lets us go and she is laughing and seemed like she had a little fun with it. She was cold outside so I put a jacket over her and she told me to hug her.

 

We part ways and I tell her to call me after she meets her friend. She calls and has a serious tone saying that she doesn't want to keep in contact again and was slightly crying on the phone. She tells me if I know why? and I said I don't know and she wouldn't tell me. I played it off like it was no big deal. I tell her if that's her decision I respect that and that I will always care for her and the times we had was one of the best experiences for me. (I told her this many times in the past.) I also told her I wish the very best for her and I will always be open to helping her and seeing her again on her terms.

 

She didn't say much and just concluded by saying "Bye!"

[RedpoleQ]

We really need a lot more details about what she says because you're not listing her specific objections. Really need those to be able come up with a good strategy so we can Jujitsu the fuck out of everything she says so the only logical thing to do is to have sex with us.

 

Really missing so much detail it's almost impossible to give you feedback. But it definitely seems like she was trying to give you every opportunity to close her. I WISH girls would tell me they need to come into my house, and use my bathroom and then lie in my bed.

 

That shit NEVER happens. I think that maybe you don't have enough info about her to understand what's going on. Also, you don't even know if she's a virgin. When she asked you if you know why she can't see you, that would have been a great time to pop that question which frames the fact that she's afraid to lose her virginity as the only possible reason she doesn't want to see you...because if she does, she know that pop goes the cherry.

 

Definitely need more investigatory questions...or you need a more detailed report, or BOTH.

 

Good work and keep at it!

[Solid]

Okay here's my second crack at it. I'll continue from the point where we get to my house.

 

After drinking with this girl we get dropped off in front of my house and I tell her lets hang out at my house and that my roommate isn’t home. She asks if she can use the restroom at my place. I tell her yah lets go and I hold her and told her that I made a mistake the other day by not bringing her up to my house and that I want to make up for it. She says that she doesn’t want to come in yet but I just grab her and take her up.

 

She comes into the house and uses the restroom. I wait in the room and light up a candle and turn on the TV. Once she comes into my room I put on music she will like on my iMac. I tell her my home is her home so make herself comfortable. I use the restroom and when I come out she is lying on the bed. I go straight in for the kill and lie right next to her. I try to cuddle with her and go straight for her face and neck and start rubbing her body. She is not really feeling it but I decided to just take all my clothes off and manhandle her. She keeps pushing away and I try kissing her trying to take her clothes off. I realized now that I definitely didn’t take it slow and might have been way too aggressive. I ask her if she really doesn’t want to do this she said no. I tell her to say fuck off then and she said fuck off but I still go at it. I ask her if she wants a squirting orgasm but she is confused.

 

She then tells me if I don’t think much of her and respect her and just wants to be friends with benefits. I tell her anything that she wanted I’m okay with because I just want to be with her. I keep telling her how much I like her and she tells me that she only has sex with her boyfriend. I keep pushing forward but she starts crying and saying she wants to go. I stop there and hold her from leaving and told her don’t worry i’ll stop. I’ll take her home but she said she wants to go by herself. I tell her I will take her to the cab and when we are outside she then just tells me to take her home.

 

On the car ride back she calls her guy friend that is her neighbor who she has known for a long time. She seems normal again and is joking around. She fixes her makeup and I try to act like nothing big happened. We just talk and I still touch her here and there and touches my shoulders on occasion. She asked me what a squirting orgasm is and I tell her to google it and find out. She tells me that I must be really good at sex. On the way home I get to an alcohol checkpoint and pulls me over. I did drink a little but the cops were cool about it. They got a call taxi for her and me. While we were waiting I kept trying to be comforting to the girl by putting a jacket around her and she told me to come hug her to stay warm.

 

We both leave and later that night she calls me and sounds like she is crying. She told me that we should not contact each other again. She tells me if I knew why. I told her that I don’t and she says she knows I do and says anyways. I try to act unaffected and that I did nothing wrong. I tell her that if that’s the case that I was so happy to have these experiences with her and I enjoyed spending time with her. She is still very special too me and in the future if she ever wants to see or hang out with me then I will always be open to that. She just says bye after.

 

I felt like I did the man thing but I also feel little guilty about her crying. I was wondering if I should apologize and tell her that I’m not sorry about what I did but I’m sorry about how she felt and didn’t expect her to be rattled by it.

[RedpoleQ]

I tell her yah lets go and I hold her and told her that I made a mistake the other day by not bringing her up to my house and that I want to make up for it.

WTF!? As I always tell you, YOU TALK TOO MUCH! If you want to talk about something, make it fun. You're waaaaaay too serious, man.

 

If you were going to say something like this, it should have been, "I made a mistake the other day by not bringing you up but my hamster was going CRAZY." You could probably think of something better, but you get the idea. Keep it fun and light.

 

Making things serious makes everything a lot harder.

 

I realized now that I definitely didn’t take it slow and might have been way too aggressive.

I agree here...seems like you could have slowed things down and created more of a mood. Also, by progressing slowly, you can back up. If things go slowly it's like the old saying about slowly turning the temperature up on some frogs and they don't notice they're getting boiled alive.

 

Ideally, you want to escalate that way too so that the girl doesn't realize how turned on she is until it's too late.

 

She then tells me if I don’t think much of her and respect her and just wants to be friends with benefits. I tell her anything that she wanted I’m okay with because I just want to be with her. I keep telling her how much I like her and she tells me that she only has sex with her boyfriend.

"You want me to be your boyfriend?"

 

I felt like I did the man thing but I also feel little guilty about her crying. I was wondering if I should apologize and tell her that I’m not sorry about what I did but I’m sorry about how she felt and didn’t expect her to be rattled by it.

You're too apologetic in general. She's a grown woman, she can take care of herself. She really can't blame you because only a total idiot chick goes to a guy's place drunk, when that guy has openly expressed sexual interest in her.

 

But, I do think you could have escalated a bit more skillfully. You need more practice for sure. Good on you for really going for it though. That's the most important thing.

 

Get blown or blown out!!