Bootcamp Shanghai April 2017

[justwater]

Amazing bootcamp experience with Kane. What a brilliant man and instructor!

Edited July 9, 2018 by Guest

[RedpoleQ]

Great write up and welcome to the party! Glad you got so much out of your time with Kane. I'll be sure to let him know! Lols

[kanevast]

Bootcamp FTW: An overview of my Shanghai Bootcamp experience with Kane Vast

 

Prior experience

I normally date 7/10 in looks and 9/10 in personality girls, with a significant fear of girls who are 9's and 10's. I have frequent relationships with women but feel like I rarely date a girl who is worth a long-term commitment, which shows to me that I'm not reaching my highest potential. Never gamed before, never read any books on game and really only met girls through solid social skills and luck. My goal is to decrease my social fears and I expect that to address underlying social anxieties as well (both with women and in other circumstances).

 

You've come into this at a pretty good place in terms of your situation and openness to learning, so teaching you so far has been pretty easy as you've picked up whatever i've given you and applied it well.

 

 

 

Overview

As I write this, I am still struck by the systematic and understandable approach to game presented in the bootcamp. Kane is a fantastic instructor, and both understands the deep theory behind game but also the practical realities of growing from a normal to a desirable man. I think the juxtaposition of these two qualities is what makes the bootcamp (and Kane) special.

 

The theory of game was presented early and often: you are valuable and if you present that value clearly to women they will appreciate it and return the favor. "Gaming yourself" is a big part of game, and that is probably the most valuable part of the bootcamp. It gave me "you can do it" reference material: we went and met women for 3 days of non-stop fear-fighting. Now I have no excuses.

 

Thanks .

Yeah you've definitely got the right idea, most girls just want guys to be capable enough at Game/life that they can be together, feel safe and happy.

One of the greatest things about this experience is looking back at how things were a month or two before and seeing the changes and differences in mindset.

 

Bootcamp Day 1 Night Game

The first day started with an overview of theory. I had read "The Black Book" ahead of time (and was half-way through a book called "The Manual"), so I was prepared and understood what Kane was teaching. He showed me (often literally, by standing up and demonstrating) the various aspects of game and how one goes through the motions with a woman. It was enlightening, because I can look back to my past successes and map it almost directly to the process he described.

 

Yeah I don't think there is much we are teaching that is really outside the 'normal' behavior of what men do with women, it's just that we've taken 100 good bits and pieces from literally thousands of peoples infield experiences and condensed them into structured lessons.

 

This is actually also why the art of seduction is fascinating, especially when you have reference experience to compare it to.

 

Then we went out to Zapata's, a dodgy 4/10 club that was perfect to practice at. I was truly shocked by how well it worked. I couldn't wipe the grin off my face the whole night, whether I got blown out or whether I got the girl's number. It didn't matter. I learned some key lessons:

1) Persistence. From a woman's perspective, they have no reason to stop and talk to you just by you saying hi. Especially in the first night, I was shocked by how often I thought a set was over and yet persisted to number close (and if I wanted, probably a first date).

2) Conversation skills. I've always hated small talk - especially with people I don't know. Kane armed with a number of topics (really simple ones like what's your favorite color, do you like dogs or cats, etc.) and taught me how to hold a woman's attention in spite of language barriers and not knowing what to say.

 

Persistence is really huge, if you remember what I told you about framing, someone is gonna hold the dominant frame, it might as well be you.

Conversation - yeah, as we've discussed, it's really just about a balance of pressure and emotiveness, the actual content is secondary.

 

3) SuperKane. There is nothing like the feeling of being stuck in a set and having Kane save the day. It happened time and time again. Whether he was dealing with the girl's friends, or whispering conversation ideas into my ear, he was the training wheels I needed to be successful.

4) Posture and other tactics. There are so many little tactics that Kane taught me, including how to stand when talking inside a loud club, where to hold the girl so you can control the situation.

 

Results: I got through a full 5 sets, including numbers and clear interest. The club didn't have any girls I was interested in going on a first date with, but that wasn't the point - it was an amazing practice night and helped me understand just how valuable this weekend was going to be.

 

Yeah it's lots of minor fixing that create the great experience for the girl.

I'm glad you got so much from the first night even though I get that it wasn't your preferred venue or girls.

 

Bootcamp Day 2 Day Game

Picking up girls at a mall? Never tried it, but today we went to People's Square shopping mall. In fact, I had simply never really hit on a girl anywhere that was not super convenient (aka house parties, the occasional club and occasionally the girl next to me at a cafe/restaurant). Wow did Kane show me how it was done.

 

 

I got blown out all day, but it was the most fun I had during the weekend. I really came away learning a TON of things about game and was able to test a number of situations that I simply never thought possible:

1) STOP. You can actually stop people in their tracks and then move into a 20 minute conversation about absolutely nothing? WTF. Yeah that was amazing.

2) Persistence. If you get denied right away, its not over. Or if you see bad body language, its not over. In fact, most of the time you are probably just misreading the situation.

 

It's difficult doing it in a mall compared to a house party of club because of the different expectations in play, which is directly related to the strength of your frame.

 

You didn't get blown out by every set, it's just that it was more than the night before .

 

I got blown out by my first 4 sets on the first day game due to them all having boyfriends and one two set that was wearing high heels who just ran away.

 

 

3) BT spikes. ANYTHING can BT spike a girl. You're just trying to either make them feel good or make a lame joke. Over time, these things might get better but I was amazed at how often my BT spikes were something as silly as guessing they were from Korea or that they were ABC's just because.

 

Results: A few number closes and a ton of blow outs. I learn more from failure than from success, and this was a great example. Also, venue-wise this was a practice venue (girls either spoke too little English or lived quite far away).

 

Yeah I think we can figure out a way for you to find approximately where your preferred demographic will be from here on.

 

As i mentioned before, the emotiveness is really the key, rather than how high brow or low brow the content is.

 

I appreciate your perspective of primarily practicing the skill as that made my job of teaching you easier.

 

 

Bootcamp Day 2 Night Game

Game on. This was easily the most successful session, and it really went well - we visited Le Baron, a 7/10 club in Shanghai's French Concession. I felt on fire throughout the night - going up to beautiful women and catching their interest quick, using touch early and often, and making them laugh. Kane was there, winging me and helping me through sets - but this was the first time I felt I really did it on my own.

 

You did a great job.

Le Baron is awesome.

 

 

The key to this night was quality. Until now, we had mostly talked to "practice" girls. Given I already had a few female relationships in China, I had a decently high bar for who I'd first date in the coming week. This night, we met at least 4 girls I'd first date. Here's what I learned:

1) Confidence. When I got blown out, I could think back and feel that my confidence was weak. For the most part, this night it wasn't and the momentum meant that nearly 75% of girls I approached hooked and gave me time to bring in the wingman. From there, my confidence rode most through to number close.

 

This 'confidence' feeling will get better and better as you practice more.

 

2) Sexual conversation?! What?! Kane had me play a fun game with girls called Strawberry Fields - where you engage the girl and talk about sex with her. I loved it and they loved it too. Frankly I wouldn't have believed it would work if it wasn't for my extreme respect for Kane at that point. Fortunately, it did and I got through 3 conversations where I brought it up and it helped build attraction to first date with the girls.

 

There are plenty of other such 'psychological tests' and routines online that you could also try out.

I was using a non sexual version of strawberry fields for a few months before I did my bootcamp, so it was easy to use, It's basically always been a winner.

 

 

3) Tricks work. At least in the beginning, the "stack" that Kane gave me at the beginning of each session was invaluable. I felt like I had enough content to go through a full set and keep the girls' interest. Given my hatred for small talk, this provided me with enough content to win.

 

It's good to hear that the stack was useful, some people get stuck with doing 'random stuff' which isn't very good, so it seems like the stack served it's purpose.

 

'Tricks' work because girls hate being bored and the tricks make things fun, they're merely a useful tool to learn how to be fun.

 

 

4) Time bridge. I almost got too excited during this night and forgot to fully close some girls. It wasn't a major goal, but it is useful to remember: the structure matters and it works; if you want to get good you must turn it into second nature to go through the whole thing.

 

Results: many number closes, but most importantly a first date with a girl who fit my criteria. More attractive than girls I'd normally meet with a great personality. I ended up first dating her and we'll see if it leads to a second date.

 

Yeah it's really important to internalize the structure, so practice practice practice.

 

With a bit of luck you will get that girl out again and make things happen.

 

 

 

Bootcamp Day 3 Day Game

Ride that wave. The confidence and momentum from the previous two days led us through to the hardest day of the weekend: Day Game at Xintiandi (a high-end shopping area in Shanghai). It was fascinating to try approaching and getting through sets in that environment.

 

Xintiandi is fantastic.

 

Overall, I left this session feeling like Kane was a freaking genius and this process he taught us is going to work. It will take consistent practice, but it works. Here's what I learned:

1) Confidence. No matter how hot, fast-walking, uninterested the girl looks, you need to confidently command their respect. This was a huge lesson - and at some point we simply just practice stopping girls in their tracks. I'm now quite good at it and I think this day was a real breakthrough day.

 

YES.

 

 

2) Storytelling. If there was one major breakthrough today, it was how well I was getting through the story Kane had me tell about my life. I didn't think a girl would sit there and listen to me for 8 minutes tell a story after she just met me, but not only did they do it, but they LOVED it. I was amazed at the reactions I got afterwards from them.

 

Yeah the 'connection' part of the story really really hits home with girls because this is what they are doing with each other a lot of the time and its something that a lot of guys really don't do well.

 

3) BT BT BT BT. It is hard to under-BT spike a girl. Just constantly keep things interesting and engaging, and I can't wait until this is second nature. For now, it was fun to see girls' reactions when you are able to hold their attention for that long and make them smile.

 

Results: a few number closes and an insta-date. But most importantly, the understanding of how valuable persistence can be and how well it can work if you lead and manage the situation.

 

Yep! Keep up that improv and using the exercises we went over and it will become pretty normal pretty fast.

 

In Summary

The bootcamp laid the foundation for everything I needed to know about approaching women, whether during day or night, with words or with gestures/emotions, and in many different situations. I felt like from here practice was the key: just keep going out and trying and eventually this will become second nature. Amazing experience.

 

Glad to hear it!

 

It was a real pleasure working with you and i'm looking forward to seeing you before/during the summit!