Newbie FR: Freelance Model during Mall Game / Direct Opener

[Peter Pan]

Excuse Me, I just saw you walk by and I told myself that I would regret not saying hello to you because I think you are cute.

 

-oh thank you

 

*Uncomfortable silence*

 

Uhhhhh….uhhhhh…uhhhhhh Sorry I’m really nervous right now, I really don’t know what to say. I’m sure this happens to you alot

 

- *nods* Yes

 

I just finished lunch with my coworker and heading back to the office when I saw you. I work at Northpoint, right next to this mall. What are you doing?

 

-Oh im meeting a friend for lunch

 

Right now? *looks at watch*, its 2:45pm, wow that’s a late lunch, did you just wake up? (smiling)

 

-oh haha no, I’m a freelancer and just finished a project and now meeting my friend

 

Oh that must be nice to be able to set your own schedule. What type of freelancing do you do?

 

-Oh just modeling, car shows and things like that.

 

Wow that’s cool, maybe you should try selling cars, I bet alot of people would buy them from you

 

- *gives me wierd look*

 

No really, it doesn’t hurt to try.

 

- No i’m just a student

 

Let me guess…you are studying in PR? Education?

 

-No I study accounting

 

Accounting? Are you sure, I think that was a bad choice. It doesn’t match you at all.

 

-Really? Why do you say that?

 

As a model, I’m assuming that you enjoy being in front of people and talking to them. In accounting you are just sitting in front of a computer all day. its so BORING And I HATED accounting.

 

-Why?

 

I graduated in business mgmt so we had to take accounting 1 & 2, finance 1 &2, statistics 1&2, etc. But I hated accounting so much that I failed the first time I took it.

 

-haha but accounting is so easy

 

Yea it is really easy but I just hated doing it. You know accounts receiveable, payable and all those long word problems. I really think accounting was a bad choice, why don’t you change your major. You can stay in school longer and have more time to party

 

-haha but no I can’t change my major now

 

Why not? Uni is so much fun and you have so much free time. I didn’t do anything and i had the best time. Trust me, the 9-5 is boring.

 

-haha well my sister studied accounting…

 

Ohhh i see now. Your older sister studied accounting and your parents pressured you into it.

 

-haha yes

 

Yea its similar in Korea too. I’m Korean so I know parents like jobs like accounting, professors, doctors, lawyers are all very popular. I bet your parents would hate that you would change your major

 

-haha well I live alone

 

Really?

 

- *nods*

 

Are you sure? all of my chinese malaysian friends live with their parents. You are the first chinese I met that lives alone.

 

-Really? because all of my friends live alone…

 

Wow thats crazy, how did you get out of the house? did you runaway?

 

-haha no, I just wanted to live alone. Now I pay for everything.

 

Are you serious? you pay for rent, insurance, everything by yourself?

 

-yes, what do you do?

 

I work in advertising but I also have a side business as well. So when do you graduate?

 

-I graduate next year thats why I can’t change my major.

 

And are you going to look for a job in accounting?

 

-haha no i don’t plan on working

 

Really? I guess you are looking for a rich boyfriend so he can pay your rent, insurance, etc

 

-No I can pay for that myself

 

You can even buy me dinner?

 

-Yea why not

 

Are you serious? I have never had a girl pay for dinner. I think that would be so wierd

 

-I do all the time, its no big deal.

 

Wow very independent, I like that.

 

-Well I have to go meet my friend now, nice meeting you

 

Yea it was nice meeting you, can I get your number?

 

-Do you have Wechat?

 

Yes, you know I will ask you for a date right?

 

-*nods*

 

I open wechat and add her, saying it again, ‘you know im going to ask you for a date’

 

Well it was nice meeting you. Handshake (the only kino for this set)

 

 

Problems:

 

1) no challenging

2) she wasn’t invested into the conversation, didn’t as much about me nor did she talk much. But she is really soft spoken so maybe that was the issue.

3) didn’t really ask alot about me, it was just me talking the whole time. Probably no attraction.

4) no kino

 

Good things:

 

1) atleast I approached!

2) good eye contact, animations, smiling

[Romeo]

Congrats on approaching!

 

Quick feedback:

 

- If you're going to do a direct opener, you need to stack immediately into something else. No awkward silence. Don't expect the girl to respond.

 

London daygame guys stack with "What I noticed about you was..." then talk about what you noticed or like about her. Then transition that into a cold read. Watch the videos I linked for examples.

 

- When a girl says she's on her way to do something or meet someone, I always ask what time it starts / what time she's meeting them. If it's soon or in the past, I'll tease her: "You're (running) late! Are you always late? Are your friends going to be mad at you?"

 

Now I know how much time I have to run the set, how hurried she is. It's hard to tell if your girl left because she was bored or because she had somewhere to be. If you find out her time constraint, you can handle the set better.

 

- Seems like you did most of the talking. That's normal in the beginning until you hook the set, and you want to do that occasionally to share things about yourself.

 

But you want to do more to get her to invest. Two of the best ways I can think of to do this are

 

1) bullshit cold reads / teasing. Run with your role play even after she contradicts it, make it really ridiculous, and she'll want to invest hard to correct you.

 

2) Make it about her, not you. You're trying to understand her as a person, at the core of who she is. You're trying to get a picture in your head of what her life looks like and what makes her tick.

 

Example of both: So when she says she studies accounting, instead of relating it back to yourself and what you know about the subject (I hated accounting), make it about her, and make it fun: "Accounting?! No, I don't believe you. Accountants are huge nerds. So you spend all day sitting in front of a computer, moving numbers in spreadsheets?" -haha no, it's not like that! "So you must be really good at math then. Like a math wiz, you can calculate all the equations in your head." -no I hate math! "You hate math?! Then why'd you decide to become an accountant?" -hahaha I don't know. "So when you graduate, you want to do bookkeeping for a big company?" -haha no I don't plan on working. "Oh... then why are you studying accounting?" - well, my sister studied accounting. "Ohhh I see now. So your parents pressured you into studying accounting because your sister did, but you really enjoy modeling." -haha yes. "Yeah it's similar in Korea too. I'm korean so I know parents like jobs like accounting, professors, doctors, and lawyers. You must be a really good daughter, I bet your parents love you so much they never let you leave the house." -haha no actually I live alone. Etc.

 

Same content of the conversation, but in my example you're showing a lot of interest in getting to know who she is, and finding out the information in a way that's fun for her. Whereas in your example you were mostly relating her answers back to yourself, or asking her interview-style questions which aren't particularly fun for her to answer.

 

Really good is if you can get into her motivations, emotions, and character traits. This would be something like "Wow, most Malaysian girls I know live with their parents and are supported by them. That's really impressive that you moved out on your own at such a young age, you must be really independent. Wasn't it scary?"

 

- "You can even buy me dinner?" This may be ok as a bt spike, but you kind of carried the thread. In general I probably wouldn't make a joke like that because she might not realize whether you're joking,and now you're putting more pressure on her if she decides to meet you. It's hard to tell from your FR of she got uncomfortable at this point.

 

With those type of jokes, I would make it extreme: "Wow, you're a rich girl! Yes!!! That means you can take me on a trip to Hawaii! Ah, I can't wait to tell my mom a rich girl is taking me to Hawaii!" -hahaha noooo I'm not rich! "Ohh, really? That's too bad Ok don't worry, I'll take you out for something to eat so you don't starve to death! Hey, do you like xxxx food?" (Seed a date)

 

- "You know I will ask you for a date right?" Don't say this!

 

Framing it as a "date" puts unnecessary pressure on the girl. You just want her to meet you, not make her rationalize whether she sees you as a potential boyfriend after a 5 minute interaction. You're also putting yourself in the frame of trying to court her.

 

Keep it light and fun. Your goal is that she walks away thinking that was fun and she really enjoyed interacting with you, so if she meets you again it's going to be more of that fun.

 

- "No kino" -- I wouldn't worry too much about kino during daygame. Yes you can use a bit of kino, but it should be minimal, and if you have solid eye contact and a flirty vibe I find it's not necessary in daygame. Some of my daygame sets I have zero kino. Night game is completely different, I use heavy kino.

 

Some easy ways to get kino in in daygame if you do want to practice it: 1) Sometimes I'll poke the girl in the shoulder with my finger while teasing her, or playfully tap her shoulder (VERY LIGHTLY) with the back of my fingers while teasing or playfully disqualifying her. 2) Introduce yourself and hold out your hand, but instead of shaking her hand just keep holding it while looking at her eyes and continuing conversation. Don't pull away until she does. If your romance vibe is strong enough, sometimes you'll just end up holding the girl's hand the whole set.

 

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[RedpoleQ]

Great to see you writing your first FR.

 

Agree with pretty much everything that James said for feedback.

 

You're really weak on BT Spikes in general...probably because you're too concerned with coming across as weird and don't want to take risks when everything seems to be going well.

 

The issue is that if you don't push your interactions harder, you'll have a lot of pleasant interactions that go nowhere whereas if you take more risks you'll increase your chances of having interactions that actually go somewhere.

 

I disagree with the "no kino" part. I think that it's important for two reasons:

 

1) most people don't kino because they are afraid to so it's an important learning stage to develop the ability to kino

 

2) I think that touching seems to really help with getting them more involved in the set, even if it's just a nice to meet you handshake.

 

Good work getting out there and write more FRs.

[Peter Pan]

What are some examples of pushing the interaction?

[Romeo]

Teasing / challenging. Saying things that the girl may not like as opposed to just agreeing with her and giving her validation for everything she says. Having real qualification material and attempting to screen the girl out by seeing if she matches it. Kinoing. Making lightly sexual jokes.

 

Basically doing anything that you should be doing to move the interaction in the direction you want it to (you having sex with her), but you're afraid to do because you're afraid of getting bad reactions from the girl. Doing the things that allow you to wind up banging the girl instead of falling into the friend zone.

 

You have to LEAD the set in the direction you know it needs to go instead of pursuing good reactions and approval from the girl.

 

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