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Romeo

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Romeo last won the day on May 31

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  1. Congrats bro, and welcome! The most important next step here is follow-up — make sure you keep up the habit of doing approaches after your bootcamp, every single day if possible, especially for the first 30-60 days. Set a quota, whether it's 5 approaches a day, 3 approaches a day, or even 2 or 1 approaches a day — most important thing is building the habit. It's hard to do and takes will-power, but if you do this immediately following your bootcamp, it will lock in all the lessons you learned throughout the weekend. Guys who don't do this will typically wind up 3-6 months later in basically the same place as they started, except with a distant memory of this one weekend where they temporarily had the ability to approach girls 😛 So to make sure you get the best value out of the training, make sure you're diligent about putting a follow-up daily approach program in place. It's hard (having a friend to do it with helps immensely), but this is the best gift you can give yourself of the future!
  2. I love this piece, and it's one of the few that have seriously affected my world view. So glad you had this saved, since I tried to reference it a while back and found that it was no longer online. Thank you for sharing! Sent from my SM-G965F using Tapatalk
  3. Congrats and welcome! That's awesome that you've kept up the momentum after your bootcamp. I've seen a lot of guys come and go over the years, and the biggest determining factor in if a guy gets really good is consistency. If you keep doing approaches every day / every week, ask questions and post field reports to take advantage of RPQ and the other guys' knowledge to address your sticking points, you'll keep gradually getting better month over month. And if you keep it up in the long-run, you won't recognize yourself in a year or two. So find a way to keep going out and doing your approaches consistently -- having a wing or other guys to go out with every day is the easiest, but there are a lot of methods to make this happen. The more days per week you do approaches, the more reference experience you'll get, and the faster you'll improve. And take advantage of the forum, chats, weekly calls, and any in-person meetups (I think you guys have a lair in Tokyo too) to ask as many questions as possible. Hope that helps! Maybe I'll see you around if you ever visit Seoul, or next time I visit Japan. Sent from my SM-G965F using Tapatalk
  4. Awesome write-up bro! Sounds like you learned a lot on your bootcamp and you know exactly what areas you need to work on to keep improving moving forward. Looking forward to seeing you in action! (Love the handle, by the way haha). Sent from my SM-G950N using Tapatalk
  5. Awesome seeing your progress on your bootcamp man! To be honest, after seeing you the first night, it looked like you were going to have a lot of trouble overcoming approach anxiety. But fast forward to day 3 daygame, and you were a machine! Trailblazer or I would just point at a girl, and you would just go without hesitating. And you looked super smooth in set. So awesome to see that kind of transformation! I hope you're keeping up with approaching on your side of the world. We're an ocean apart, but the guys in Seoul are here to help if you have any questions or sticking points along the way. And as RPQ mentioned, I'm sure a couple of us wouldn't need much convincing to come out to a tropical paradise full of Japanese girls [GRINNING FACE WITH SMILING EYES] Sent from my SM-G950N using Tapatalk
  6. Great field report bro! It was awesome seeing you improve over the bootcamp weekend -- total transformation by day 3! You looked like a natural in daygame sets. Also really good to see you active in the alumni chat and keeping the momentum going by hitting up daygame consistently. Keep that up, keep asking questions about issues you run into, and you're going to be crushing it! Sent from my SM-G950N using Tapatalk
  7. Ar-miiiiin! Good stuff bro! I'm really glad you decided to take the bootcamp. You're right in that it's going to continue to pay massive dividends over the years (as long as you continue to ask questions and ask for feedback on your field reports). Looking forward to going out with you more often! Sent from my SM-G950N using Tapatalk
  8. Welcome to the A Team bro! I kind of like 'DKNova' actually, when I say it out loud haha. DEE-KAY-NOVAAAAA!!! It's been great having you in the group and having you contribute! Your level of drive is inspirational. Looking forward to epic times ahead! Sent from my SM-N920S using Tapatalk
  9. Great having you on board bro! This is just the beginning -- if you keep going out, asking questions about your sticking points, and applying the advice as consistently as you have been since taking the bootcamp, you're going to crush it. Sent from my SM-N920S using Tapatalk
  10. Teasing / challenging. Saying things that the girl may not like as opposed to just agreeing with her and giving her validation for everything she says. Having real qualification material and attempting to screen the girl out by seeing if she matches it. Kinoing. Making lightly sexual jokes. Basically doing anything that you should be doing to move the interaction in the direction you want it to (you having sex with her), but you're afraid to do because you're afraid of getting bad reactions from the girl. Doing the things that allow you to wind up banging the girl instead of falling into the friend zone. You have to LEAD the set in the direction you know it needs to go instead of pursuing good reactions and approval from the girl. Sent from my SM-N920S using Tapatalk
  11. Congrats on approaching! Quick feedback: - If you're going to do a direct opener, you need to stack immediately into something else. No awkward silence. Don't expect the girl to respond. London daygame guys stack with "What I noticed about you was..." then talk about what you noticed or like about her. Then transition that into a cold read. Watch the videos I linked for examples. - When a girl says she's on her way to do something or meet someone, I always ask what time it starts / what time she's meeting them. If it's soon or in the past, I'll tease her: "You're (running) late! Are you always late? Are your friends going to be mad at you?" Now I know how much time I have to run the set, how hurried she is. It's hard to tell if your girl left because she was bored or because she had somewhere to be. If you find out her time constraint, you can handle the set better. - Seems like you did most of the talking. That's normal in the beginning until you hook the set, and you want to do that occasionally to share things about yourself. But you want to do more to get her to invest. Two of the best ways I can think of to do this are 1) bullshit cold reads / teasing. Run with your role play even after she contradicts it, make it really ridiculous, and she'll want to invest hard to correct you. 2) Make it about her, not you. You're trying to understand her as a person, at the core of who she is. You're trying to get a picture in your head of what her life looks like and what makes her tick. Example of both: So when she says she studies accounting, instead of relating it back to yourself and what you know about the subject (I hated accounting), make it about her, and make it fun: "Accounting?! No, I don't believe you. Accountants are huge nerds. So you spend all day sitting in front of a computer, moving numbers in spreadsheets?" -haha no, it's not like that! "So you must be really good at math then. Like a math wiz, you can calculate all the equations in your head." -no I hate math! "You hate math?! Then why'd you decide to become an accountant?" -hahaha I don't know. "So when you graduate, you want to do bookkeeping for a big company?" -haha no I don't plan on working. "Oh... then why are you studying accounting?" - well, my sister studied accounting. "Ohhh I see now. So your parents pressured you into studying accounting because your sister did, but you really enjoy modeling." -haha yes. "Yeah it's similar in Korea too. I'm korean so I know parents like jobs like accounting, professors, doctors, and lawyers. You must be a really good daughter, I bet your parents love you so much they never let you leave the house." -haha no actually I live alone. Etc. Same content of the conversation, but in my example you're showing a lot of interest in getting to know who she is, and finding out the information in a way that's fun for her. Whereas in your example you were mostly relating her answers back to yourself, or asking her interview-style questions which aren't particularly fun for her to answer. Really good is if you can get into her motivations, emotions, and character traits. This would be something like "Wow, most Malaysian girls I know live with their parents and are supported by them. That's really impressive that you moved out on your own at such a young age, you must be really independent. Wasn't it scary?" - "You can even buy me dinner?" This may be ok as a bt spike, but you kind of carried the thread. In general I probably wouldn't make a joke like that because she might not realize whether you're joking,and now you're putting more pressure on her if she decides to meet you. It's hard to tell from your FR of she got uncomfortable at this point. With those type of jokes, I would make it extreme: "Wow, you're a rich girl! Yes!!! That means you can take me on a trip to Hawaii! Ah, I can't wait to tell my mom a rich girl is taking me to Hawaii!" -hahaha noooo I'm not rich! "Ohh, really? That's too bad Ok don't worry, I'll take you out for something to eat so you don't starve to death! Hey, do you like xxxx food?" (Seed a date) - "You know I will ask you for a date right?" Don't say this! Framing it as a "date" puts unnecessary pressure on the girl. You just want her to meet you, not make her rationalize whether she sees you as a potential boyfriend after a 5 minute interaction. You're also putting yourself in the frame of trying to court her. Keep it light and fun. Your goal is that she walks away thinking that was fun and she really enjoyed interacting with you, so if she meets you again it's going to be more of that fun. - "No kino" -- I wouldn't worry too much about kino during daygame. Yes you can use a bit of kino, but it should be minimal, and if you have solid eye contact and a flirty vibe I find it's not necessary in daygame. Some of my daygame sets I have zero kino. Night game is completely different, I use heavy kino. Some easy ways to get kino in in daygame if you do want to practice it: 1) Sometimes I'll poke the girl in the shoulder with my finger while teasing her, or playfully tap her shoulder (VERY LIGHTLY) with the back of my fingers while teasing or playfully disqualifying her. 2) Introduce yourself and hold out your hand, but instead of shaking her hand just keep holding it while looking at her eyes and continuing conversation. Don't pull away until she does. If your romance vibe is strong enough, sometimes you'll just end up holding the girl's hand the whole set. Sent from my SM-N920S using Tapatalk
  12. Looks like you're already aware of what I think was your biggest blunder here: not closing her on the d2. If you get a girl in a situation where sex could go down and it doesn't, she may (subconsciously or not) rationalize why she didn't end up having sex with you and justify it in her mind, which will make it harder for you to close her later. You had a logistically good closing situation and you should have continued moving it forward unless she was making a serious effort to stop you -- listen to girls' subcomms, not their words. A frame I use when closing the girl is the Rake frame -- she's so sexy I can't control myself. I'll playfully blame the girl and tell her to stop. She'll ask stop what, and I'll say stop being so sexy, you're turning me on and I can't control myself, I don't think I can resist you. Or I'll tell her to stop distracting me from (whatever we're ostensibly doing while I escalate on her). I'll alternate that with periods of backing off and resuming the activity with light kino, then saying something like "God, you are SO hot" and start kissing on her neck again, acting like I can't resist and have no choice but to do so. Once I d-move the girl, I'll give her a look that's kind of hard to describe. It's kind of a mix of 1) I'm completely overcome by lust and I NEED this right now, like I'm a heroine addict getting his fix and 2) almost like I'm pleading with them to stop turning me on, like I'm some pathetic creature who has zero self control, and I don't even really want to be doing this right now but I have no choice because of what the girl is doing to me. I find this turns girls on a LOT to be desired in that way, and it's allowed me to close a lot of girls recently even in high LMR situations where I thought it wasn't going to go down. It's awesome on a lot of levels -- one because it naturally mixes in push pull into your close (whereas if you're all push the girl might freak out). It also flips the script and makes it so the girl is the one seducing you, not the other way around. So now she's an active participant in the closing process -- it's not that you're trying to manipulate her into having sex with you, it's that you're both sharing this experience of being overcome by each other and things just kind of happening. Thirdly it triggers a natural need all girls have, to be desired strongly by a man, so it turns them on a lot despite what their logical brain is telling them. A couple other points on your FR: - Being mad / upset with the girl will almost never serve the purpose you hope it will. - How long were you together on the d1 before trying to close her? Seems like it was probably too fast. Usually I need to be with the girl for a minimum of 3-4 hours for the close to feel natural to her and not awkward. In Korea at least, trying to close too early can blow you out with the girl and she won't meet you again -- see my note above on girls post-rationalizing why they didn't have sex with you. Sent from my SM-N920S using Tapatalk
  13. Good stuff! What's the finger nail polish question thing? How long were you communicating through text outside the glass? Was this just 2 or 3 messages you showed her that she laughed at, or an extended interaction? Sent from my SM-N920S using Tapatalk
  14. 1. What was her demeanor throughout the date? Did she seem engaged and seem like she was having a good time? 2. Logistics. When I lived at kyodae stn, one station away from gangnam, it was a lot harder to get home bounces simply because of that taxi ride. It's soooo much easier to home bounce girls if you can just walk them to your house. I would suggest having them meet you within walkable distance to your house if possible. If not, meet them and taxi earlier if possible to a first or second venue that's near your house. I imagine it would be easier to get her in a cab if your reason for doing so was that you know a great place for blah blah blah, it's only about 5 minutes from here, or whatever. 3. It seems like from your report that you were doing a lot of talking about yourself. That stuff is good, but I'd say the vast majority of my conversations are about the girl, her passions, her interests, her emotions, her experiences. It's straight Dale Carnegie -- everyone loves themselves, so if you want people to like you, talk about them. Sent from my SM-N920S using Tapatalk
  15. The Stoic Cato advised that one should only feel shame for that which is truly shameful. Here you don't have anything you should feel bad about. Like you said, the girl had bad frames about sex, and it was probably doomed from the beginning. Perhaps if you were a bit smoother you would have been able to blow past them. But also maybe not. In any case, you tried, you took right action and pushed your own boundaries, and now you come away with more experience to draw from on future girls. It takes a lot of experience trying this stuff and fucking things up before you get calibrated enough that your escalation feels smooth and natural, and you're comfortable and confident with your frames around sex. I still fuck up regularly. But every girl I bring back to my place, I'm a bit smoother, a bit more confident, and a bit more solid in my frames. I had that same experience multiple times this year where I escalated too fast/hard on a girl and she ended up leaving, and in at least one case she never messaging me again. It stings for a couple days---you feel like you've done something wrong, like you've been rejected. But give it a few days to sleep it off, and the bad feeling will fade. What will be left is more points of reference experience that your brain will subconsciously use to calibrate next time you're escalating on a girl. In the end, humans have been having sex for pleasure (not simply for copulation) since before the dawn of our species (there's a good Ted talk RedPoleQ recommended about this, but the name of the speaker escapes me). So when you try to escalate on a girl and she freaks out, you're just being a normal human and she's the one being weird I don't mean that in a judgmental way---some girls have serious issues around sex due to their past experiences. But it's simply up to you if you want to invest the time to work through these issues with her, or if you want to just go for girls who are already comfortable with sex.
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