RedpoleQ

Great write-up! The few things I want to point out. Getting into state shouldn't be a goal. It should be a by-product of good execution. There's no value in feeling great about your set when you're doing everything wrong. This is assuming your goal is to get tangible results and not to just "feel good" talking to women. This is the most important hurdle to overcome. And you need to understand that as you get better, and the skills and habits Kane was trying to instill in you during the boot camp become normal for you through practice, it's only natural that you'll hit flow state more and more frequently because it's when you preparation and skill align with the situation. Unfortunately, until you get a lot of reference experience, every approach is novel so it's hard to hit the right kind of flow state which is why it shouldn't be a goal.

Perfect! Yup! Time to start schooling the no-FR writing n00bs! Great replies and I'm looking forward to what's next.

How did you end up with the co-worker's WeChat? If the co-worker is a guy, he's probably cockblocking. If it's a girl, maybe they're trying to target switch you... You can show intent...that's totally different from it being a "date". Intent and interest to bang is one thing. But a "date" has all sorts of bad and boring connotations attached to it. "I want to bang you, let's hang out at the park and see how we like each other" is a lot better than, "I want to bang you, let's go on a date." Their boyfriends also don't know how to manage them too. Hahahahahahahahahaha Even if you are cheap, don't let girls think you're cheap. Actually, being "cheap" is a bad trait all around. And you're not actually cheap. Because you do spend money if you see the value, hence you took the boot camp and the sex seminar. You just don't want to waste money and want to make sure you get value for money. So you should reframe how you see yourself, because girls are pretty comfortable with a guy being willing to spend money on quality. What's more important? Seeming normal, or getting what you want? Ultimately, it doesn't matter. You just should understand that jumping through a girl's hoops doesn't necessarily mean that you're more likely to close. It only means you'll be more likely to get the meet. So, you need to consider whether you're willing to give that level of compliance for the meet. Also, keep in mind that if she "seemed keen" then she's MORE likely to give you the compliance you want. In fact, the amount of compliance you can get IS the measure for keeness. Oh. That makes sense. I think the first step for me IS being aware of the social situation. Though all of this helps with that a lot, because you're clearly pointing out things that I do not realize at all. So thanks! That's exactly why EVERYONE should be posting like you are. This is usually a result of over-confidence, laziness or BOTH! Sounds great! Good work and keep at it!

Yes, you do. This is a great way to end up in all sorts of bad situations. ? What do you mean? NICE! Ummm...what makes you think she's conservative? Because she said she is? Don't listen to what women say about themselves...they're busy managing their image. Remember the Madonna/Whore dichotomy? She's on the way to a date and gives out her number to a random dude. WARNING! WHORE! So, she tells you that she's conservative or whatever which feeds your ego by making you feel extra special and also makes her feel like she's framing herself as Madonna enough that you will respect her. Why were you waiting somewhere with no signal? You should always wait somewhere convenient for you and you should always be prepared for girls to be late or to cancel because they do...FREQUENTLY. Lols. She told you or you saw it on her WeChat or something? Anyway, since you're leaving, it's perfect for her. All the evidence of infidelity will fly away and she doesn't have much time to party before it's time to get knocked up and pop out a baby. You shouldn't say date in any country. It makes it too formal and serious. You want it to be as casual as possible whereas saying it's a "date" puts a lot of expectations and it also means that the girl has to have romantic intentions towards you which she may no be comfortable acknowledging. This is why you shouldn't let girls pick. Ask in the group chat for day 2 ideas! This is also called, HAVING FUN! And is a great quality in a girl who you have communication problems with. This is NORMAL traditional female behavior. Why? If you can't afford it, then why should she want to date you? If you can't afford a steak dinner, how could you afford to take care of her and the kids, right? The bigger problem is that you allowed yourself to be in this situation, in the first place. This is exactly why you should decide where to go and not leave it up to girls. She may not be "using" you. This might be totally normal for her and the guys she dates. Also, you need to remember that Asia does't have all this western hogwash about male/female equality, where men are men and women are men too. If you're not happy with women playing a more traditional role, then you'll need to stick to westernized women...I would't recommend it though ? Don't make it transactional, tell her that next time it will be on you. I know you're cheap, but don't appear cheap. It's very unattractive. This is pretty good. You should have led with this. "Sorry about that...I have more cash back at my place, so we can go back and get it." That's a pretty decent (though arguably dark) home bounce plan. She's not attractive enough to take our for coffee? Most of the problems you had with this girl were of your own making. You should never take a girl to a place where you'd be unhappy about having to pay the full bill and you're not required to give her levels of compliance you don't want to. The key is to give her compliance strategically, but never so much that you'll be angry or upset. I'm equally baffled... It's also better to train girls to send you pics directly than to have to download them like some pervy stalker, lols. Another way to handle this is to tell her that if she didn't look so good, you wouldn't want to touch her so it's her fault. Also, you could tell her that next time she shouldn't take a shower and wear dirty close and she won't have to worry about that happening anymore. I wouldn't do this with any girl I haven't already had sex with. Asian girls are EXTREMELY worried about their public image and when you regularly do things that embarrass them, they won't want to be around you. If you're going to do this sort of thing, you should do it in a semi-private place like a stairwell or elevator that only the two of you are in, for example. They'll still be embarrassed, but when you show that you're aware of the social situation, they'll feel comfortable. Almost guaranteed to trigger ASD. What were you hoping to accomplish? Agreed. You should have written the HBSpasticDancerGirl and HB BathroomFriendGirl in separate posts, and save this just for approaches. YES! It seems that the issue is that you didn't plan a sexcalation location into your day 4 plan. Whenever you plan your meets, you should plan around getting them to the close location, whether that's THIS meet, or if you want to use a particular meet to make sure you'll be able to get them to the close location easily the next time. Somehow, I missed this post...sorry about that!

Can you give me an example plz? Me: is there any food you don't like? Her: Ummm...I don't like lamb. Me: Perfect! I dated a vegetarian before and it was awful...we couldn't go to any of the restaurants I liked and I couldn't share my favorite foods with her. Plus, we couldn't travel anywhere, because if we went to Thailand, for example, then I'd have no way to know what food she could eat and what she couldn't, but with you, it can be a food party every day! *high five* -- In the above example, I gave an example of how her not being a picky eater is good, and how if she were it would be bad. You don't need to do both, but it's obviously stronger if you do put in both. I will try it over text messages. Don't do this over text! Better to try and arrange it when you meet her in person. If you demand more compliance, especially about something that might trigger ASD, you'll lower your chances of getting the meet.

Excellent! Preparation is key! I'm sure you felt a lot more comfortable during the day 2 because of it. Did you tie in the qualification with how those traits are good for your life or the lack of those traits is bad? Here is great deep comfort! Killing that comfort game, baby! NICE! Excellent! PIE is so important. There are a few options. 1) tell her you'll get it this time and next time she can buy coffee or something 2) Say to her, "Do you have x amount?" which is like 1/3-1/2 of the bill. Is it possible she means a private DVD room? If you said, "Yeah, I've been to a movie theater, but I heard about these DVD rooms and we don't have that so I really want to try that." You should have tried to set the next meet as well. Great FR and looking forward to your continued improvement!

PERFECT! Yup, that's exactly how. Copy and paste from the time stamp of the quote you want to quote.

Great first Day 2, man! Congrats! I'm wondering why you ended the day 2 when you did and how long was it in total? Also, did you schedule the next meet yet, and if not why not? It would be helpful if you mentioned exactly what threads you opened and how you engaged her, because HOW you do something is as important as WHAT you do. You can get on a stage and tell jokes, but if they're not good jokes, or if they are good jokes but delivered badly, they won't be funny. DETAILS! DETAILS! DETAILS!

Great review! I've found that different books can have different impacts on us, even when it's the same information. For whatever reason the same message from a different source can have a much bigger impact. I've been amazed at how many people found Ekhart Tolle to be transformational, but I've never been impressed with him at all. Thanks for taking the time to write this up! Also, please link the video you watched here so others can check it out.

It was a full body hug, I think. It was standing straight up, she wasn't wrapping her legs around me or anything Hahahaha!!! I wouldn't expect the leg wrap! Okay because my mother and grandma both do the same thing and I wasn't sure if it was an attempt to ruin her being sexy Naw...it's just not considered to be a problem to talk about for Asians. When I was teaching English in Japan, my adult students would show up and I'd ask them how they're doing it they would frequently say that they were either constipated or had diarrhea! Even the young hotties! AH, just like "you looked like you were having a lot of fun in the water fountain for kids" kind of thing right? Right, exactly! Thanks! And the feedback helps immensely I feel pretty dumb for not trying to do this sooner haha! This is how people who learned PickUp have always learned. Go out (preferably with other guys who are both better and worse than you) >> write FRs >> repeat! Works every time!

Was it the full body hug or the lean in upper body only hug? Probably a better frame is to say something like, "Yeah, that's why I don't do one night stands. Too risky," or something like that. No point in talking about STDs, unless you can say that you just got checked and even then frequent checking just implies that you fuck a lot of girls randomly (otherwise you wouldn't need to get checked...) This is some Asian thing. They don't have nearly as much of an issue with discussing bodily functions, like Westerners do. I don't think there's much you can do, but I'd be keen to hear other people's opinions. Respect! You should have tried to bounce her somewhere for isolation... Glad you jumped on this opportunity, but you probably should have tried to engineer it earlier. For all you know she WANTED to be alone with you. Instead, you should do some call back humor to bring her back to the positive state of the day 2, and talk about what you'll do when you see her tomorrow...show don't tell. What SPECIFICALLY will you do next time instead? One thing though, always suggest the mom and the daughter are friends or sisters. The mom's LOVE that. Great FR, and keep them coming!

Just try to close as normal. By bringing up religion, specifically you're possibly creating a problem where there isn't one. All objections will come out when you try to close. If you're concerned, you can roll out some of the sexual frames that we talked about in the Art and Science of Sex Seminar. Girls don't like it when you make other plans after them because it shows a low level of interest in them. Also, it's possible she wanted to get full closed and your time constraint meant that wasn't possible. On the other hand, it can be a DHV by showing that you're not THAT into them. What are these, exactly? I wonder why she texted you instead of just telling your directly...strange.

Great report! Looking forward to following your progress and commenting when I think I have something to add.

Movie Night: 500 Days of Summer Part 1 Movie Night: 500 Days of Summer Part 2

Great FR, man! You KILLED it on the boot camp. Thanks for winging me in that set, it was a lot of fun, and it was great seeing you in Chengdu! Looking forward to you doing a daily write up like @The Animal so we can really up your game!

If you were going to follow up, what would you follow up with? The power of good wingmen! YES! Great post from @ShinChoc!! Everything he wrote is spot on. Listen to this man, he knows what he's talking about!

Change is tough, but it's also exciting because you can set everything up the way you want without having to think about what you've already done in your past. With approaching and dealing with AA, there are a lot of frames you could use to get over it, but the real problem is that you don't choose helpful thought patterns. You let your mind keep you in negative mind states that keep you from taking right action. So you need to find some mindsets that work and train your brain to focus on them. I'd recommend reading "Unlimited Power" by Tony Robbins if you already read "The War of Art" and "Flinch" and neither of those worked for you.

Great post and I'm glad you're thinking about this. I hope that some of the guys post their thoughts and experiences about this, because I think it's important to think about this stuff.

NB: All my advice is for Asian girls You should say something about a specific piece of her outfit or makeup. Only do this if she is a super confident girl who thinks that you would be really into her. If she doesn't think that, then this will just lower her self confidence and make it harder for her to open up to you. Some guys are very skilled at destroying the girls self-esteem and then setting it up so that sleeping with them is the only way for the women to redeem themselves. If you're not skilled at that, then you should only use these kinds of negs one girls who will think their value is higher than yours or who think that you're super thirsty and don't have many other options. How close is this rooftop to your place? I would only try for the k-close here if it's in the same building and you can basically close her there. Otherwise if it goes well and you get the k-close, you risk triggering ASD on the home bounce, and if it goes badly, you probably won't be able to bounce her to the sex location afterwards where you would be in a better position to move between comfort and sexcalation for the close. Is there anything in your place that girls who are regulars like to play with or look at when they're over besides you and your penis? Use that. Probably playing them something on the guitar would be my go to if I were you, or showing them a video of your performing that is part of a hero story. -- You're general plan is good, but as @kanevast points out, it's too vague in terms of what threads you're going to be running which means that you may not set the frames you should be setting and you may set frame that work against you. Looking forward to your reply.

Yeah...usually making out without being able to close triggers ASD and it makes it a bit harder to progress things later. Though, if you do a meet where you don't try to close, then that can often be enough, if you run it well. It seems pretty straight forward. You assumed the full-close would happen and that she was going to close. Because you assumed, you didn't control any of the variables that could get in the way (event/venue/social situation/isolation plan/etc) and you didn't prepare a plan for how to progress things towards the close including frames that you might need to set or any kind of progression plan from now to get her from point A to point B to point C to the closing location. Without FRs from the previous meets it's hard to give any specific advice but I wonder why you weren't able to close her on the day 2 or day 3. Good on you for writing this up, man! And I'm looking forward to working on upping your game so you can get better quality since that's what you seem to be ready for. Keep at it!

If you're in state, your sets will run better. However, if you develop your skills, even when you're not in state, your sets will still run well enough to get results. That's thing you should get away from is RELYING on state. Understand that when it's better, you'll do better, but don't sit around waiting for it. Read the book, The War of Art by Stephen Pressfield. It's a short book, but what he says in it about being a professional vs an amateur is exactly what I'm talking about here. Were you clear that she had already finished her class or did you think she was going to go? If you didn't know, you should have found out so you could get time constraints. You could have tried to have lunch with her. Her: I have to go eat lunch. You: Oh, nice! Are you meeting some friends for lunch? Her: No You: Really? Where are you going to eat? Maybe I could come too. *now, depending on what she says, you'll have a good idea about if she's keen for you to join her or not. All good! Why did you go for the WeChat at this point in the set? Lols! Great you noticed this...and I definitely know this feeling of noticing myself staring at a girls tits. Start with basics like high fives, hand shakes, fist bumps, etc. Happens to all of us sometimes. ? When you run into this kind of situation where the girl is really keen, talk to her like an English teacher: What. Is. Your. Name? Do. You. Like. Apples? etc. Great open! You should have just asked her! Who are you here shopping with? Seems like you're running your sets for only like 5min, so it's no wonder they're not responsive. You should really try to run your sets for like 15-20min ideally. Also, you need to add the other parts of the sarge into your sets. So far, you're just doing BT Spikes and DHVs and then asking for the WeChat and not doing any qualification, comfort, seeding or trying to set time-bridges. If you start doing those things you'll get a higher response rate. Great to see you getting out there and I hope you keep posting your approaches and getting feedback so you can level up!

Actually, this is a directions opener which is a type of very indirect opener. Situational openers can be great! This is a complicated question, involving a lot of factors, but in general, it will be smoother if you do pay and you definitely avoid potentially being labeled as cheap if you pay, but it also may not matter. I consider it to be a risk not worth taking given the price point you're dealing with here. Just to be clear to those reading who weren't there, this was a blonde haired JAPANESE girl. Love those! Awesome write up and I'm glad you got so much out of the boot camp! It was great having you there and following you in the chats as well. Good work and keep at it!

This is why we set the next meet BEFORE we go for the close. If you're already scheduled to meet her again then you can point that out. Why is this a good thing? What would have been the purpose of breaking rapport. She basically said that she wanted to have sex with you but you needed to isolate her away from the friend and that she needed to know that it wouldn't be a one night stand. Both of those could have been pretty easily handled, it sounds like. Good to see you writing an FR! Keep them coming!

It's always good here to tell her they can pay for something next time or they can get the next round. Future projection and seeding, ftw! Great SNL seed, here. The make-out part isn't so important and can actually sink the lay, but the rest of this is spot on! Not rushing towards penetration and the pussy in general really helps reduce LMR. Nicely done. This is not a good habit to get girls into. When you have multiple girls, it will be hard to get rid of them if they're used to doing this. Plus, they have ample time to snoop around or leave things lying about that can get you into trouble. Spot on! Moving is an even better option! ? This should be, "Things I WILL do better." And this one should be, "Things I did well." Don't focus on what happened focus on what you have control over, your actions. You can act right and lose and you can act incorrectly and win, but in the long run, you'll win more through correct action so focus on that. Excellent! Yeah, setting the next meet BEFORE the sexcalation is always advised if you want to keep the girl around. It also tends to reduce LMR. I'm glad to see you writing on here, and in the future I hope to see a lot more FRs from you as they are far more valuable. You can learn a lot more from your failures than your successes. Good work and keep at it!

Champion!